San Fernando Valley High
by girl-inspired
Summary: Tweedle-Tay and Michaela Manson move to LA, where they encounter a postmodern pastiche of characters from teen and fan fiction. Part 3 of the Tweedle-Tay Saga, and sequel to Tweedle-Tay & His Evil Twin and Mansons in the Attic. Hanfic parody.
1. Fly The Wings of An Eagle

Chapter 1 - "Fly the Wings of An Eagle" - Tweedle-Tay's Story  
May 27, 1999 - Oklahoma City, Oklahoma  
  
"Have a nice flight," the flight attendant said to me, checking my ticket and flashing a big smile. "Is this your first trip to LA?"  
"No, I've been there a few times before," I replied, taking in her gorgeous face and long, slim legs.  
Michaela rolled her eyes. "Yes, we used to live there," she said, taking my hand to drag me away. "Have a nice day," she added with almost mock courtesy.  
"See you on the flight," I added, glancing back at the woman. Michaela and I walked down gangway, carrying our hand luggage.  
"Let's see, we're in seats 5A and 6A," Michaela said, checking the tickets. We walked down the aisle of the plane and took our seats. "I can't wait to get back to LA," she said happily. "It will be so nice to see my house again and look at the posters on my walls and swim in my pool and go to the beach and see all my old friends........."  
"Will we be going to Beverly Hills High?" I asked, surprised. "Wouldn't that be a little stupid. I mean, all your friends will think it's a little weird that you've disappeared for a couple of years and then all of a sudden reappear with a brother."  
Michaela looked thoughtful. "You're right. How silly of me. We'll have to go somewhere else." She sighed. "I'm going to read," she said, picking up the issue of 'Brassy' that she'd bought at the airport shop. Matt Damon was on the cover. "He is so feral," Michaela said, a look of disgust on her face. "He looks like a deformed vampire or something!" She held up 'Sixteen' magazine and raised her eyebrows. "Do you wanna read?" she asked.  
I nodded, and took the magazine from her. No sooner had I browsed the contents page than a girl with a light brown bob appeared next to me. "Excuse me," she said, "But I think you're in my seat."  
"No I'm not, my ticket says that I'm sitting in seat 5A and my sister's sitting in seat 6A," I replied.  
"Well," the girl said, her hands on her hips. "I think you'll find that you're meant to be sitting in 4A. My ticket says 5A." She held up her ticket. It said 5A.  
Michaela held up my ticket. "Well, my brother's ticket says 5A as well," she said emphatically.  
I nodded and looked at the ticket. "Actually, it says 4A," I stuttered.  
Michaela frowned. "Look," she said to the girl. "My brother and I would like to sit together. Surely you don't mind sitting in 4A?"  
The girl scowled. "I paid for 5A and I'll get 5A. If you don't let me have 5A I'll complain to the flight attendant," she said.  
Although I quite liked the idea of the flight attendant coming over to talk with me, Michaela did not. "Whatever," she said, motioning for me to move.  
I got out of my seat and let the girl sit down. I looked at her. She looked about fourteen and had light brown hair and light brown eyes. She had a sprinkling of freckles over her nose and she was wearing baggy jeans and a Puff Daddy T-shirt. A homie. She noticed that I was looking at her and said, "Hi, I'm Lauren*. What's your name?"  
"I'm Michaela, and this is my brother -" Michaela began.  
"My name's Twee-" I began.  
"This is my brother TJ Hanson," Michaela said, looking at me meaningfully.  
"So TJ," Lauren said, batting her eyelashes. "How old are you?"  
"I'm sixteen," I said, unenthusiastically.  
"We're twins," Michaela added.  
Lauren looked at Michaela with contempt. It angered me. If she wanted to talk to me, she may as well talk to someone who was almost an exact genetic replica of myself as well. "I'm thirteen," she continued, flicking her hair. There was a silence. "So, why are you going to LA, and where did you come from?"  
"Well, when two people love each other very much, sometimes...." Michaela began sarcastically.  
"We're going to LA because we're going to be living there and we came from Tulsa," I said politely. I saw fear light up Michaela's eyes and she started shaking her head and mouthing 'don't go there'.  
"Really?" Lauren said. "I just came from Tulsa, my grandmother lives there. What school will you be going to? I'll be starting San Fernando Valley High next September."  
"Um, we don't know yet, but we might be going there," I said nervously.  
Lauren gave a little smile that said 'you are sooooo boring, I'm just going to try to get out of this conversation right now'. Well that was fine with me. "I think I'll just listen to my walkman," she said, plugging the head phones in.  
I was so happy because I thought that would mean she'd finally stop talking. I opened up 'Sixteen' and looked out the window that was next to Michaela. Fluffy white clouds filled the sky. I turned to an article called 'Losing It - The Giant Leap'. I began to read about the trials and tribulations of a girl who lost her virginity at twelve when I heard an awful noise filling the plane, or at least the area near me. I looked at Michaela, but it was Lauren. She was obviously a wannabe homie because she was singing along with Jewel, if you could call it singing along. She was missing every note that went above the G above middle C or below the B below middle C. It was shocking! I looked at Michaela who was trying not to giggle. Lauren had her eyes closed and was immersing herself in Jewel's singing. Unfortunately, we had to immerse ourselves in Lauren's singing.  
Finally the song finished and Lauren removed her head phones. "I've been taking singing lessons," she said.  
"Oh, you should keep them up," Michaela replied, wide eyed and serious.  
"Thanks," Lauren said, smiling. "So," she said, returning her attention to me, "Do you have a girlfriend?" 


	2. You Don't Know What You've Got Til It's ...

Chapter 2 - "You Don't Know What You've Got Til It's Gone" - Fergie's Story  
June 5, 1999 - Tulsa, Oklahoma  
  
"There she was just a walking down the street," Neuton sang with mock dramatics.  
"Singing do-wa-diddy-diddy-dum-diddy-do," Grubbery, Elizabeth, Kestrel and Mackie joined in.  
The holiday had been lovely. Neuton was leaving for college in a few months so it would be the last family holiday we had for a while, possibly forever. And without Tweedle-Tay and Michaela, it wasn't even a proper family holiday. When would we let them out of the attic? We couldn't keep them in there forever...... I desperately wanted to talk to Skipper about what we should do, but, well, with eight children to care for, or even six, it was hard to get time alone.  
"Okay, what song should we do next?" Kestrel said eagerly.  
"I know, how about Aaron Carter?" Elizabeth said with a faraway look in her eyes. I groaned inwardly. Eleven year olds!  
Grubbery groaned outwardly. "How about silverchair?" he suggested. "Just wait til tomorrow!" he said, making his voice deep.  
"You found out I've got a crush on you!!" Elizabeth and Kestrel sang over the top of him with squeaky falsettos.  
"MMMPop....." Neuton attempted weakly. MacArthy joined him.  
Mozzie began to cry.  
The noise was just too much. I had a screaming baby, two little pre- teen teenyboppers, a wannabe grunger, and a pathetically uncool adult all singing different things in the back seat. I looked over at Skipper, who was nodding his head along to the mangled beat. Why wasn't he doing anything? Finally I couldn't take it anymore. "Shut up!!!!!" I screamed, turning around to face the children. The car screeched to a stop.  
"What did you do that for?" Skipper said angrily. "We could have had an accident."  
"I thought you liked our singing....." Grubbery said, pouting.  
"I'm sorry," I said, my hands fluttering up to my neck. "I do like your singing........ I just need some peace and quiet. You weren't even singing the same songs...."  
My children looked back at me, silent and wide eyed. Finally Skipper said, "Well if there won't be any more surprises, I guess we'll get going again."  
And so we rode back to the house in silence. Ten minutes later we pulled up in front of the house. "Oh my lord!" Neuton said in shock. We all (except Grubbery, who's hands were busy elsewhere) crossed ourselves. There was a hole in the front window of the house. My first thoughts were of the twins. What if they had been hurt? "The little shits," Skipper mumbled under his breath. He obviously thought the twins had made the hole.  
We got out of the car and slowly approached the house, Skipper and Neuton leading the way. Skipper unlocked the door and we all walked inside. Half the furniture in the house was missing! The book shelves had been raided, there was mud all over the floor, there was no food in the fridge.......  
My eyes widened with terror. I yelped and started to run up the stairs. I came to the attic door - it was slightly ajar. I ran up the attic stairs and found - emptiness. The beds were unmade, but they hadn't been slept in for days. The television was still there, and so were a lot of the twin's belongings, but enough was missing, enough important things were missing....... Michaela's purse was missing. My first instinct was to make the beds. As I folded the sheets neatly, I looked at the attic, I looked at the walls, the first time I had looked at them properly in a year and a half. I saw the mural, I saw the neatly printed pages, I saw what I had done.  
I cried out in a mixture of pain and terror and collapsed onto the floor. "What have I done?" I cried out, weakly. "What have I done?" I knew what I had done. I had destroyed the psychological well-being of two normal, happy teenagers. Now they would destroy mine.  
I heard footsteps walking up the steps of the attic. I moved quickly, but not quickly enough. As I began to push the door close, my son, who was now as tall as I was, pushed it open. I looked at Grubbery. Grubbery looked at me, at my tear-filled eyes. And then Grubbery saw the mural on the wall, the paintings of the blonde children. Tweedle-Tay was artistic and the pictures actually looked like the twins.  
"Tweedle-Tay! Michaela! They weren't on the streets - they were in the attic! The whole time I was missing them they were right here in the attic the whole time, weren't they?" he screamed.  
I couldn't say anything. I couldn't lie again. The truth had to come out sometime, but how do you tell your son that you've emotionally and physically abused his brother and sister?  
"You bitch!" he yelled, slapping me across the face. "You don't love your children at all - not any of us. If only the Tay and Kay weren't in the attic Manson would still exist and we'd all be happy! Instead they've come to their senses and left! Well guess what? I've come to my senses too! I hate you! I hate Dad! And I hate Neuton! I'm leaving and I'm going to find Kay and Tay! FUCK YOU!!!!!" he bellowed at me, and ran down the stairs.  
I lay perfectly still on the floor, sniffing, sobbing, crying. Fifteen minutes later Grubbery returned, holding a backpack. "Goodbye, Mommy dearest!" he said, kicking my leg and turning to walk quickly down the stairs. 


	3. 24 Hours From Tulsa

Chapter 3 -"24 Hours From Tulsa"  
  
Grubbery traveled to LA in search of the twins, and called everyone under the name of Morgan in the phone directory, but he never found the twins. Because no one had been living in the Morgan house for nearly two years, their phone number had been taken out of the directory. And when it was put back in the directory, it was under the names of Thomas John and Michaela Louise Hanson. Grubbery wasn't nearly perceptive enough to pick up on the similarities between these names and his older brother's and sister's names. Why would he think to call everyone with a rhyming surname to his own? If he had been paying proper attention, he may have seen Tweedle-Tay and Michaela getting their hair cut in an expensive salon on Hawthorne Avenue, but he was paying more attention to his feet than his siblings. And so Grubbery returned to Tulsa after only one week.  
Meanwhile, Tweedle-Tay and Michaela were going through all the changes that would be necessary, before they could start school. They were both seriously emaciated (Tweedle-Tay 6'0", 110lbs, Michaela 5'7", 90lbs), so they visited a dietitian, and went on a special diet to help them gain about 20 or 30lbs each. Their hair was long and full of split ends, so they got trendy hair cuts. Their clothes were too big and out of fashion, so they went on shopping sprees on Rodeo Drive. And they were sixteen-year- old Californians, so they learnt how to drive. With so many improvements to make so they could be normal again, they weren't ready to return to school before the summer holidays began, so they started the eleventh grade in September 1999.  
And that brings us up to date with the story. 


	4. Stop

Chapter 4 - 'Stop' - Michaela's Story  
September 7, 1999 - San Fernando Valley, California  
  
'Stop right now, thank you very much, I need somebody with a human touch........' the radio blared.  
Tap. Tap. Tap tap tap tap tap. Tap tap tap. Tap tap.  
I looked up from my powder compact at Tweedle-Tay, who was tapping on the steering wheel to the beat of a Spice Girls song. I rolled my eyes. "Would you stop that Tay?" I said, annoyed.  
Tweedle-Tay looked puzzled. "Stop what?"  
"Stop tapping along with Spice Girls songs. What are you - a ten year old girl?"  
"Oh, sorry...... I didn't notice I was doing it. I guess it helps me concentrate," he said, a little embarrassed.  
"Well, it stops me from concentrating," I complained.  
"Let's see," Tweedle-Tay said. "You're fixing your makeup, I'm driving. Who really needs to concentrate? I think -"  
A car pulled out in front of us. Our car swerved and screeched to a halt. "Fuck! Tay, can't you pay attention to the road?" I screamed.  
"Not while I'm talking to you," he said under his breath.  
"Didn't you even notice the 'give way' sign?" I said angrily. "Get out of the car.... I'll drive." I coated my mouth with lipstick and got out. I walked around to Tweedle-Tay's side of the car and hopped in. We fastened out seatbelts and I began to drive.  
It was our first day of school. We couldn't go to the local high school in fear of being recognised so we had to go to San Fernando Valley High which was a half hour drive from our house..... on a good traffic day. I turned the radio off and put on my Garbage CD. "Burn me, break me, breaking down is easy, all I want is you....." I sang along. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Tweedle-Tay giving me a dirty look. He was so up himself sometimes. He was shocking driver, yet he insisted on doing it because - get this - he was the guy.  
"Can't you go any faster?" he said impatiently.  
"I'm driving faster than the speed limit already. Do you want us to get a ticket?" I groaned. I could see Tweedle-Tay mouthing along with what I was saying. He pouted. "Come on Tay, I don't want to fight with you... we don't know anyone here in the Valley, we have to, you know, get along...."  
Tweedle-Tay smirked. "We know Lauren...."  
I laughed. "Yeah, that'll put us on the top of everyone's social list."  
"Sorry Kay...." he said.  
"That's okay...." I replied, stretching the truth just a little.  
"Can I drive?"  
I didn't even bother answering him. I turned into the school parking lot and pulled into a parking space. I checked my reflection in the rear view mirror and we got out of the car. I smoothed down my green suede skirt and checked the bottoms of my shoes. I picked up my folder from my seat.  
Tweedle-Tay smirked. "You are so obsessed with your appearance," he said, swinging a bag over his back.  
"Moi?" I said, shocked. "I'm not the one who spent an hour deciding what to wear this morning, am I? Those pants are too tight," I added, looking him up and down.  
Tweedle-Tay looked slightly self-conscious. "Whatever," he said, blushing.  
I felt slightly guilty, but what the hell. "Let's go to registration," I said. As we walked along the lawn towards the school, I looked at the large white building. "It looks like a mental asylum," I said aloud.  
Tweedle-Tay actually looked slightly afraid. He glanced warily at the ninth grade girls who were sitting on the steps drooling over Nick Carter posters. "Michaela, are these pants really too tight?" he asked nervously.  
"Well, not exactly. They're not loose but...... they're just you. You know what I mean?" I said tactfully.  
Tweedle-Tay said nothing and walked along with his hands in his pockets. Finally we reached the office and joined the line to get timetables. After a few minutes we reached the front of the queue. "Um, excuse me," I said. "Can we have our timetables?"  
The blonde secretary looked back at us, worn out. "Sure honey, what's your name?"  
"I'm Michaela and this is my brother TJ Hanson," I said.  
"Hanson.... mmmmm..... just wait a second while I print them out. You're new here?" she asked. We nodded. "You'll like it here, everyone's nice. But some people are nicer than others, if you know what I mean? Here are your timetables," she said, handing us each a slip of paper.  
"Thanks," I said. Tweedle-Tay and I walked outside and sat down on a bench. Tweedle-Tay was shaking. "What's wrong?" I asked.  
"I'm gonna get bashed up," he said. "You heard what that woman said, some people here aren't nice. They're going to recognise me and the guys are gonna bash me. Guys don't like Manson. And my pants are too tight and they're going to think I'm gay..."  
"Well, you're not gay are you? I can certainly vouch for that," I said bitterly. "And TJ," I added emphatically. "No one remembers Manson, they haven't had as single out in a year and a half. I swear, you place so much more importance on yourself than anyone else does."  
"Right," Tweedle-Tay replied, unconvinced.  
"Okay," I said checking out the timetables. "We have chemistry and music together. When I have advanced math, you have intermediate. We're in the same English class. When you have biology, I have American history and when I have physics, you have visual arts. Can you see that?" I asked, showing him the timetables.  
"Yeah," he replied. "And today's Tuesday, so we have chemistry first."  
"Mmmmmm, in room S2. Class starts in five minutes..... we may as well go there now," I said getting up. We walked around the school looking for the science rooms. "Okay, there are two important things you should remember. Firstly, you are TJ Hanson, not Tweedle-Tay Manson. And secondly, we don't have to hang out together all day. We might, but if we don't, meet me at the car at 2:30 p.m., ok?"  
"Right," Tweedle-Tay said smoothing his hair. We had come to the classroom. I opened the door and we walked in. Practically the entire class was already there but there was still a table with two seats on it. We started to head towards it when a pretty girl with shoulder-length brown hair called out to me. "Hey! Come sit here!" she called. I looked behind me, but no one else was there, so I looked regretfully at my brother and walked over to sit down.  
"Sorry to bother you," the girl said, smoothing down her lilac designer dress, "but I just couldn't bare sitting with that tryhard Gwen. You didn't want to sit with your sister did you?"  
"Oh no, that's my brother," I said, feeling embarrassed for Tweedle- Tay.  
"Sorry," the girl giggled, "I couldn't tell...... from behind," she added hastily. "Your poor brother, Gwen's gone and sat next to him."  
I turned around to see a girl with platinum blonde hair and a pink dress sitting with Tay and flicking her hair. "Dye job?" I asked.  
The girl nodded. "Home dye job," she said in disgust.  
"You can tell, the roots are showing," I said. Gwen's hair had a dramatic colour change from dark brown to pale blonde.  
"You have nice hair, is it natural?" she asked.  
"Yah-huh. My brother's hair is the same colour and he would never dye his," I explained.  
"Right. I should have known. I'm Cordelia Fowler," the girl said.  
"I'm Michaela. Michaela Hanson."  
"And your brother?" Cordelia asked.  
"TJ," I said.  
"You two look really similar," she said.  
"Oh, you should have seen us two years ago. We were practically identical. But now it's really just hair and eyes," I said thoughtfully.  
"So where are you from?" Cordelia asked.  
Shit! I had forgotten to settle that with Tweedle-Tay before hand. I may as well just tell the truth. "Oklahoma," I said.  
"Really???" Cordelia was shocked. "You have such a Californian accent."  
"It must be the television. You should hear TJ's accent," I explained.  
"Where abouts are you living now?" Cordelia asked.  
"Beverly Hills, and you?" I replied.  
"Near Queens Park. Why do you come here from so far away? Did your parents think Beverly Hills High was too snobby?"  
"Oh, we live by ourselves. Our parents are still in Oklahoma," I replied. As soon as I said it, I realised what I had done.  
Cordelia however, did not notice a thing. If anything she looked incredibly impressed. "Mmmmm. Well, you can be my chem study partner and you can come sit with me at recess."  
"Cool," I replied. "By the way, I love your dress."  
The teacher cleared his throat. "Good morning year 11, and welcome to chemistry. I'm Mr. McClure and you might remember me from such classes as general science in the ninth and tenth grades. The first topic you'll be doing today is Carbon Chemistry. Well? Write that heading in your books girls and boys."  
  
**************************  
  
"See ya Cordelia! See ya Jenny, Victoria, Kristy, Maria!" I called out, running across the lawn to the car park. Tweedle-Tay was already sitting in the driver's seat. His arms were crossed and he was frowning. I'd taken the keys with me but he'd obviously climbed over the door. I unlocked the passenger door and climbed in. "What's wrong?" I asked.  
Tweedle-Tay rolled his eyes. "It's 2:40. You have a watch, you made me wait ten minutes."  
"Oh sorry Tay," I said, handing him the keys. "I was talking to my friends."  
Tweedle-Tay started the car. "Well, I have friends too, but I still managed to turn up on time. Gwen wanted me to go out for milkshakes with her but I didn't."  
I frowned. "Do you actually like Gwen?" I asked.  
"What's not to like?" he asked. "She's a nice girl and a good friend."  
"Cordelia doesn't like her, she says she's a bit of a, I don't know, tryhard?" I said carefully.  
"Cordelia doesn't like Gwen? But Gwen likes Cordelia so much," Tweedle-Tay said, puzzled.  
"Well, Cordelia doesn't like Gwen," I replied, in a matter-of-fact way.  
"She must be a real bitch," Tweedle-Tay said, shaking his head.  
"Oh, she is. Nobody likes her. That must be why she's attached herself to you so quickly," I explained.  
"I was referring to Cordelia," Tay replied.  
"Ooooo - catty!" I said, raising my eyebrows.  
"Gwen's a nice girl, you should get to know her," Tweedle-Tay continued.  
I groaned. "Isn't that Mr. McClure a weirdo?" I said, changing the subject.  
  
************************** Meanwhile in Tulsa..............  
  
Grubbery sat by his bedroom window. For the first time he could remember, he only had to share the room with one person, rather than two. MacArthy was out at soccer training so he had the room to himself. Grubbery opened up his journal and began to write. "Alone in the attic, my sister and I......" Poor Tweedle-Tay. Poor Michaela. He wanted to see them so much, he wanted to make sure they were okay. Grubbery wanted to have a party with Tweedle-Tay, like he did all those years ago. He wanted to get drunk on doctor pepper and scream a lot. Grubbery wanted to have fun again. Instead he was stuck in stupid little Tulsa with his evil parents and dorky brothers and sisters. He wanted to start a grunge band, like Nirvana. Maybe he'd go and find Kurt Cobain and get some advice on how to be that good...........  
"MMMPop, ba du ba da ba du Pop...." Grubbery's thoughts were interrupted by a CD in the room next door. He slammed his journal down and stomped into Elizabeth, Kestrel and Mozzie's bedroom. Kestrel and Elizabeth were dancing along with the CD and giggling. "Would you please turn that crap off?" Grubbery asked.  
"It's not crap," Kestrel said. "That's you singing!"  
"It's much better than the stuff you play now. Why don't you play MMMPop and Here's the Love and I Will Come On You and Strange anymore, Grubbery? They are far better songs than the ones by the Smashing Beetroots," Elizabeth said, folding her arms.  
"Smashing Pumpkins!" Grubbery yelled. "It was Tweedle-Tay who loved that stuff, but he's gone now, and he'll never come back! Tweedle-Tay is gone! Michaela is gone! And neither of you give a fuck! Neither of you care that it was our parents who sent them away!"  
"Don't swear Grubbery. And anyway, Tweedle-Tay chose to leave," Elizabeth replied.  
"Who's Michaela?" Kestrel asked.  
"Who's Michaela????? She's your sister! You're telling me you don't even remember you're sister????" Grubbery screamed.  
Kestrel stood silent, her lip quivering.  
"You are so mentally deficient!!!" Grubbery screamed removing the CD from the player and chucking it out the window. He stormed out of the room.  
"Sucked in Grubbery, 'cause we have twenty-five copies of that CD!" Elizabeth called after him. 


	5. Barbie Girl

Chapter 5 - 'Barbie Girl' - Gwen's* Story  
September 23, 1999 - San Fernando Valley, California  
"So this is where you live...." my friend TJ Hanson said as we walked up the pebbled driveway to my Norfolk Road house.  
I nodded. "Would you mind holding my books for a second while I get my keys out of my bag?" I asked, holding out the books,  
"No problem, Stefani!" he grinned, using his pet name for me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I hated No Doubt. "Why don't you get yourself a bigger bag?" he asked. "Can you actually fit anything in the one you have now?"  
"I can fit in my purse, mirror and makeup, and that's all I need really," I said, unlocking the door and gesturing for TJ to come in.  
"Yeah, you know, you don't need books or anything at school," TJ replied sarcastically.  
"Exactly," I said, flashing my most flirtatious smile. We walked into the kitchen. "You can sit here," I said taking my books. "I'll just go up to my room to drop off my stuff."  
I ran out of the kitchen, up the stairs and into my bedroom. I threw my books and bag onto the bed and looked at myself in my full length mirror. I twirled around so that I could check myself out from all angles. I was wearing a light pink (designer!) top and a tight, bright pink 'Valley Girl' skirt. I looked stunning, especially against the backdrop of posters that covered my walls. Matt Damon, Leo DiCaprio, the Backstreet Boys, JTT, Tweedle-Tay Manson - I looked great next to all of them, and they looked even better than usual standing with me. Speaking of which, my new friend TJ was drop dead gorgeous. He was just sooooo perfect. With his long blonde hair and blue eyes he looked exactly like Tweedle-Tay Manson, only taller! Actually, I had a sneaking suspicion that he was Tweedle-Tay, and he wanted to come back into normal society after his terrible disappearance two years ago. Poor Tay! TJ and Tay shared the same birthday too, which added real substance to my suspicions. I tied my platinum blonde hair into pigtails with pink ribbons. I looked totally cute - perhaps the cutest I'd EVER looked! I grabbed my math textbook and ran back down the stairs and into the kitchen.  
TJ was sitting at the table, tapping and looking bored. Wasn't that something Tweedle-Tay Manson did? Oh well, TJ looked absolutely gorgeous. He was wearing tight jeans, a black shirt and a red jacket (probably designer!). But then again, he could afford it, he lived in Beverly Hills. That was why we had to walk to my place instead of using his car. TJ's sister needed it for the half hour drive home. My parents would drive TJ home when they got back from work. TJ was also wearing three necklaces, one with a cross, one with a soccer ball and the other with a star in a ring. "Would you like something to eat?" I said, batting my eyelashes.  
"Sure," he said, smiling.  
"What would you like?" I asked.  
"Anything you have is fine."  
"Well, you're in for a treat!" I said excitedly. I wasn't much of a cook, but I had a feeling, just by looking at TJ, of what kinds of foods he'd like. I got a packet of brownies and packet of red jellybeans from the kitchen cupboard and took a root beer from the fridge. "I hope you don't mind, but I don't have a lot of time to cook you a meal for afternoon tea...."  
"Oh don't worry - this is great! I love this sort of stuff," TJ began to eat enthusiastically.  
I got up, poured myself a glass of water and sat back down at the table, watching TJ eat. He looked so cute! He looked at me curiously. "Gwen, why aren't you eating?"  
"Um, I don't eat...." I said softly.  
"Why not?" he asked, confused.  
"Oh, I don't want to get fat," I explained.  
TJ rolled his eyes. "That is so dumb Gwen. You are so skinny, you should eat more.... how much do you weigh anyway?"  
I was so embarrassed. There was no way TJ would go for me if he knew how fat I was. "Ah.... ninety lbs...."  
"Is that all? See, I knew you were thin. Michaela is only two inches taller than you but I'll bet she weighs about thirty lbs more than you, and she's not fat. She's only a four or six or something...." Tweedle- Tay said.  
I shook my head. "You're just being nice. I've seen your sister, she probably weighs like 70lbs or something...."  
"Well maybe when she was nine," TJ grinned. "Eat a jelly bean, it's not going to kill you." He shoved one into my mouth. My god! TJ touched my mouth. That was practically kissing (if he'd used his mouth rather than his fingers). I smiled sweetly.  
"Thanks Tay....."  
TJ looked at me in shock. "What did you just call me?"  
I looked down at the table, trying to hide my blushing face. "Um..... I called you Tay. Sorry, you see, I used to have a thing for Manson and you just looked so much like him and I went off into a little fantasy....."  
"Well," TJ said. "I'm not Tay so don't get too carried away in your little fantasies. We wouldn't want you to just come out and kiss me or something, would we?"  
"Of course not," I said hastily. "Well, we'd better start studying now, let's go to the loungeroom."  
We got up and walked into the loungeroom. TJ sat down on the couch and I walked over to the CD player and took a CD from the rack. "I work better with music," I explained.  
"I hope so, because the Math test is on next Tuesday and I don't want to fail," TJ said as I joined him on the couch. The CD began to play.  
'Have you ever stood outside a picket fence, you see through but you can't get to the inside - Oh you sit there and wait, I look at you and anticipate what we could be and what we could do....'  
TJ groaned. "Why are you so interested in Manson, they haven't recorded anything for years. They are total has-beens."  
I looked at TJ carefully, ready to interpret his reaction. "Oh, I don't think so. In fact, if Tweedle-Tay Manson turned up on my doorstep today and asked me out I would say yes."  
TJ snorted. "You must be desperate........ Anyway I think we should be talking more about Math and less about Manson. Can you do absolute values?"  
"Noooo," I whined. "They are so hard, and so confusing and so useless."  
TJ nodded in agreement. "They sure are useless, but I think we're going to find them very useful in the test on Tuesday. I was talking to Michaela the other night and she explained to me how to do them and they're actually really easy. All you have to do is take a number and if it's positive, it's positive and if it's negative, it's positive. Just take the number and make it positive, no matter what."  
"Yeah, I get that but I get really confused when it's like, equations over 'x' equaling other equations and the 'x' equation is an absolute value and you have to figure out what 'x' is...." I explained.  
And so TJ and I continued our fascinating discussion of Math for the next hour and a half. By that time, my Manson CD was on its second rotation and it was up to my favourite song, 'I Will Come On You'.  
"Wow TJ! I actually get this," I said excitedly. "You're really good at math. Why aren't you in the advanced class with Michaela?"  
"Oh," he said. "I only know what I know because she explained it to me."  
"Don't be so modest!" I protested. "You're probably going to top our class and they'll send you to advanced."  
"I don't think so. I'm not actually very good at math. I'm more of an English person myself. I only know a lot 'cause I've done a lot in the past couple of years. Michaela and I really didn't have a lot else to do," TJ explained.  
"Really? Why not?" I asked, moving closer to TJ.  
"We just spent most of our time together, without anyone else at all. We were basically teaching ourselves from home....."  
"Oh poor you! I guess you've never had a girlfriend," I continued.  
"Not exactly," he replied carefully.  
It was time, I decided. I had my opportunity to lean in and begin ecstasy. I fluttered my eyelashes and moved in.  
'I will come on you.....Oh I will come on you.'  
I heard a key turning in the door and my parents' voices. "Gwen honey are you home?"  
I quickly moved back across the couch. Luckily TJ had not noticed my attempt to kiss him. My mother and father walked into the loungeroom. "Hi Gwen, who's your friend?" my mother asked.  
"This is TJ," I said nervously.  
"Good afternoon Mr. and Mrs. Mendelson," TJ said politely, standing up and extending his hand. They shook hands.  
"So you're Gwen's 'friend' that we've been hearing so much about?" my father said, inquisitively.  
"Oh we're just friends," TJ said, smiling. "I've been helping Gwen with absolute values."  
"Well that's nice of you," my mother said.  
"Ah, Mom, would you give TJ a lift home?" I asked.  
"Sure," she replied. "TJ, would you like to stay for dinner? We're having Mexican."  
"That would be great, Mrs. Mendelson. I'd better call my sister first though, OK?" TJ said.  
He was such a dream! 


	6. Creep

Chapter 6 - "Creep" - Michaela's Story  
October 1, 1999 - San Fernando Valley, California  
"Who do you think is better, Keats or Eliot?" I asked my friend Kristy as we walked through the quadrangle to the table where our group settled for lunch.  
"Who cares? They both suck. My poetry is much better, you should read it sometime Michaela," Kristy said, checking out some ninth graders who were playing basketball.  
"But surely you prefer one of them?" I persisted.  
"No. Why do you care, anyway?" Kristy said, returning her attentions to me.  
"I made this bet with a girl in my English class. So?"  
"I guess Eliot is better," Kristy said, shoving past a bunch of guys who were sprawled out in a circle.  
"Huh! I'm winning. No one likes Keats!" I said, jumping up with excitement.  
"Whatever," Kristy said, shaking her head in a bemused fashion.  
"And there's Kenny, and Poochy, and Micky, and Sam - isn't he cute - and look, there's Maxi and Sherbet....." Jenny was showing Victoria the pictures of the inside of her folder. Kristy rolled her eyes.  
I smiled. "God, you have a lot of boyfriends Jenny," I said. "How do you manage to keep up with them all?"  
Maria snorted. "Those aren't her boyfriends, Michaela, those are-"  
"My dog had puppies last weekend! Aren't they adorable?" Jenny cut in, holding up her folder.  
"Oh, how cute!" I said, sitting down to have a look.  
Victoria flicked her hair. "Puppies, shmuppies! Did I tell you about my date with Jimmy last weekend?"  
"Was Brad there?" Kristy asked eagerly, suddenly paying attention. Everyone looked at her. "Not that I like him or anything..... I just think he'd be really good for, um, Michaela."  
Victoria rolled her eyes. "No. Jimmy wanted Brad to come, but you know how it is. I was like 'honey we need to'-"  
"Have I missed anything?" Cordelia said, pushing Maria out of the way to sit down.  
"No, just another fascinating discussion about Jimmy and Brad," Maria said, moving her lunch over.  
"Anyway," Victoria continued, annoyed. "We went to see Scream 3."  
"Was it any good?" Jenny asked, unwrapping her madeira cake. "Is Neve still alive?"  
"God Jenny! It wasn't like we were watching the movie! Anyway, Jimmy was so sweet......"  
"Don't you think Jimmy's a little..... effeminate?" Kristy asked with a sweet smile on her face.  
"No! He's just sweet and sensitive," Victoria said defensively.  
"Oh come on Victoria! He listens to the Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls and Human Nature. He's practically a twelve year old girl, not an eighteen year old guy," Maria said, laughing.  
"That's not true!" Victoria said, folding her arms. "He's just in touch with his feminine side. I swear you guys are so jealous, I bet you wish-"  
"Whatever!" Cordelia said. "Can we please talk about something more interesting?"  
"Yes! Please!" Maria screamed.  
"Good. Well, last weekend I was at the Valley Mall and I saw the cutest little skirt and jacket. I'm thinking of buying them for my internship next holidays. It'll make me look really responsible and professional. Don't you think?" Cordelia said, munching on a celery stick.  
Maria rolled her eyes. "Gee Cordelia....."  
So these were my friends. Sure, I guess they were a little superficial, self-absorbed, shallow - okay - bimboey. And yeah, they did make my brother Tweedle-Tay seem like Albert Einstein, but they were sweet, if a little unreliable. They knew how to have fun and god knows, not everyone can be a genius. And, if truth be told, I wasn't exactly deep. At any rate, they were better than Gwen.  
"Oh mi god! Oh mi god! Oh mi god! Oh mi god!" Kristy said. "Look who's coming over to our table!"  
"Not Brad. PLEASE not Brad...." Jenny groaned.  
Cordelia turned around. "It's Rod Rilkens*. Fix your hair, girls."  
Everyone - even Maria - got out their powder compacts and began to fix their hair. I turned to Jenny, who was tying her hair into pigtails. "Who's Rod Rilkens?" I asked.  
"Rod Rilkens," Jenny said, brushing my hair, "is only one of the best looking boys at San Fernando Valley High, besides being its hottest basketball star. He's tall and lean, with brown hair that curls down his forehead and the kind of deep, coffee-coloured eyes you could drown in."  
I smiled to myself at Jenny's over-the-top description.  
"Anyway," she continued, "if you want to be a cheerleader, you have to get along with Rod."  
"But what if I don't want to be a cheerleader?" I asked, allowing Jenny to fiddle with my hair.  
"Yeah Kay," Jenny said, thinking I was joking.  
"Hey Cordelia," a voice considerably deeper than any of my friends' voices said.  
Cordelia waited for a beat and then turned around, pretending to be surprised. "Rod! Fancy seeing YOU here!"  
"Yeah," he said, allowing his gaze to go over all the girls at the table.  
I shivered, and smoothed down my black Chanel cardigan. I looked at Rod. Jenny was right, he was good looking, which was strange as I was rarely attracted to athletic types. I guess I didn't mind basketball..... maybe cheerleading would be fun. Maybe I wouldn't feel like a performing monkey.  
"So, how are things?" Cordelia asked, adjusting her shirt and leaning over to give Rod a, shall we say, 'view'.  
"Ah Cordelia, one of your buttons isn't done up properly," I said, trying to be helpful.  
"Oops! How silly of me!" she said, giggling. "Cheerleading tryouts are on next week...."  
"So I hear," Rod said, nonchalantly. I felt his gaze return to me. I checked my cardigan to make sure it was all buttoned up. "Do you know who's going to captain?" he continued.  
"Well hopefully -" Cordelia began.  
"What are you doing next Friday night?" Rod asked suddenly.  
"Washing my hair," Maria said.  
"I already have a boyfriend," Victoria said. "But I don't think-"  
"Feeding the puppies," Jenny said, smiling. "Why?"  
"Nothing. Nothing at all. Fancy a spot of tennis?" Kristy said.  
"I thought you'd never ask!" Cordelia said happily.  
Rod looked at me. I bit my lip and looked down. Everyone at the table turned around to face me. I didn't know what to say. Rod was very good looking, if a little creepy. "Sure," I said eventually. "Why not?"  
"Great," Rod said, "See ya!"  
"See ya!" called out Kristy as Rod walked away.  
"God Michaela, why did it take you so long to answer?" Cordelia said.  
"Even Victoria said yes," Jenny added.  
"I did not! I am 100% faithful to Jimmy," Victoria said, pouting.  
"Well?" Cordelia prompted.  
I shrugged and bit my lip. "I guess I prefer blonds," I said, giving a little smile. 


	7. Whatta Man

Chapter 7 - "Whatta Man" -Tweedle-Tay's Story  
October 8, 1999 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
"TJ," Gwen said, looking at me with wide eyes. "Will you draw me?"  
I nearly spat out my Doctor Pepper in shock. "What did you say?" I asked.  
"Draw me...." she said, fluttering her eyelashes and rolling over.  
"Have you got something in your eye?" I asked, concerned.  
Gwen frowned. "No."  
"Do you wear contacts?" I asked.  
"No."  
Gwen was over at my house helping me work on my art assignment, which was really nice of her, considering that she didn't do art. We had camped ourselves in the middle of my loungeroom floor and I was painting the portrait I was working on. Actually, to be honest, Gwen was more of a hindrance than a help. "Gwen, why do you want me to draw you?"  
Gwen picked up one of my old sketch books and flicked through it. "Look at all these pictures of you sister...... you've filled up an entire sketch book of pictures of her. Smiling, sleeping, reading..... How long did you spend watching her?"  
I took the book from her and looked through it. The drawings were ones I'd done in the attic. "Well, you know, there wasn't much else to draw."  
"But you've even drawn her for your art assignment. There are plenty of things for you to draw now, TJ, no matter what the past was like," Gwen urged.  
"Well, Michaela's always around," I explained.  
"You could draw me! I know a way you could make your portrait heaps different to anyone else's portraits...."  
"Gwen, you're supposed to draw someone you love," I went on.  
Gwen frowned and made a little squealing sound. "God TJ, if ever there was an insensitive guy, it was you!" She stood up and walked out of the room.  
Gwen was weird, but I kept finding myself somehow drawn to her. I'd found myself a group (of guys), and they all hated Gwen. They said she was a slut but that wasn't true. If Gwen was a slut she'd be trying to pick me up all the time and she wasn't doing that. Gwen was just....... very highly strung. She had a tendency to get upset and excited over very little things. In that way she was kind of like Michaela, but Gwen got upset with me when I hadn't said a thing. "Gwen!" I called, "I need you to mix some paint! Would you hurry up?"  
Gwen walked back into the room with a diet soda. "Sorry TJ. What colour do you want?" she asked, sitting down next to me.  
"Mix the colours so that they're the same colour of my hair," I said, taking some blue paint to do Michaela's eyes.  
"Right," Gwen said, rolling her eyes. "You know TJ, if you ever have to do a life painting, I'd be happy to pose for you. I'm very comfortable with my body."  
"Gwen, what are you talking about?"  
"Never mind. Is this okay?" she said, holding up a Chinese container filled with a yellowy sort of paint.  
"Close enough," I said. "Thanks."  
"You know -"  
"Twee-TJ!" Michaela's voice entered the room from upstairs. A few seconds later Michaela joined it. "TJ, does this dress look okay? Hi Gwen."  
"Hi Michaela," Gwen said, looking slightly irritated.  
"Yeah, that's nice," I said, looking at Michaela's white mini-dress and matching high heels. "Are you going out?"  
Michaela looked pissed off. "God TJ, don't you ever listen to me? I told you last week that I had a date with Rod tonight."  
I looked at her dress again. "Kay, I think it's a little short. You don't want to give Rod the wrong message.... You know how guys are."  
Michaela burst out laughing. "Well, I know how YOU are!" She turned to Gwen. "My brother just looks at a girl and thinks she wants to have sex with him..... but I guess you'd know all about that."  
Couldn't Michaela ever forget the attic? Gwen glared at me. "Actually, TJ hasn't tried to crack onto me once," she said.  
"Gwen and I are just friends," I explained.  
There was a silence. Gwen's face lit up. "Michaela, are you going out with Rod Rilkens?" she asked excitedly.  
Michaela nodded. "Mmmmhum."  
"As in Rod Rilkens, star basketball player and hottest guy in school?"  
  
"Apparently," Michaela said.  
"Oh my god!" Gwen stood up.  
"Or Rod Rilkens, star girl pick-her-upper and guy who can't string a sentence together," I said under my breath.  
"He asked me out and Cordelia said I should go," Michaela explained.  
"Cordelia????" Gwen screeched. "Oh my god! I feel like I'm on 'Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous'!" Gwen paused, looking Michaela up and down. "And you're going with your hair like that?"  
"Um, yeah. What's wrong with my hair?" Michaela asked, touching it.  
"Nothing's wrong with your hair Michaela," I said helpfully.  
"You haven't done anything with it!" Gwen fumbled around in her bag, searching for elastics. Finally she found two white ones and began to do my sister's hair.  
When she'd finished, Michaela made a face that indicated distaste. "Pigtails?" she said.  
"Yuh-huh," Gwen said proudly.  
"But I look like Baby Spice....."  
"That's the idea," Gwen said, frustrated. "Guys like Baby Spice. TJ, who's your favourite Spice Girl?"  
"Baby Spice, I guess. But that doesn't mean I find her -" I began.  
"My point exactly," Gwen said. "Don't stress Michaela, you look way cute!"  
Michaela smiled. "You think?"  
"Of course!" Gwen said. "Help me out here TJ."  
"You look nice Michaela," I contributed. The doorbell rang. "Bye Kay," I said.  
"Oh my god - Rod's here! At our house too!!!!" Gwen was jumping up and down with excitement.  
"Uh, Gwen, you don't live here," Michaela said. "Um, I'm going back up stairs. You guys talk to Rod for a few minutes." Michaela ran out of the room.  
"Why?" I called after her.  
"She has to make him wait, silly," Gwen said.  
I walked to the door and turned the key. Rod Rilkens was leaning against our door. He was about six foot three and he was wearing these aqua coloured pants and yellow and blue checked shirt. Now I know I'm from Tulsa, which is way more country than LA, but Rod looked like Mr. C. Bumpkin himself. All the same, I could feel Gwen swooning next to me. What right did she have to go for my sister's date? On, the other hand, I didn't like Rod, and would prefer him to be dating Gwen than my sister. "Hi," I said, gesturing for Rod to come in. "She's just upstairs." I shut the door and we all walked into the loungeroom.  
"Hi Rod," Gwen said, extending her hand.  
Rod turned to me. "I didn't know you guys had a little sister."  
"They don't. I'm Gwen, you know, from your drama class," Gwen went on.  
"Oh.... you're the girl without a partner," Rod said, shaking his head. Gwen frowned.  
"You act?" I said in disbelief. "Don't drama students understand Shakespeare?"  
"Dude, I don't know what you're talking about," Rod said, checking his watch.  
"Shakespeare's optional," Gwen whispered.  
"I swear, it is so good to not have to go through all the parental stuff. You know, don't you touch my daughter, drive safely, and all that crap. It's like they don't want you to have any fun," Rod said. This was his attempt at conversation? And to think I thought my sister was smart. Evidently straight A's don't always make common sense.  
"TJ, did I hear the doorbell?" my sister's voice floated down the stairs. Michaela had taken her hair down. "Rod - you're here already!" There was something strangely familiar about Michaela's tone. It was the same tone she'd used on the day she'd threatened me with the gun! The same saccharine sweet, butter-wouldn't-melt-in-my-mouth tone. Maybe Michaela was going to get Rod. Cool.  
"Hey babe," Rod said, turning around to face Michaela. "You look great."  
"Her name's Michaela," I said helpfully.  
"Thanks," Michaela said - to Rod. "TJ, we'll be going now. Bye!" she said, kissing me quickly on the cheek. "Bye Gwen!"  
As Michaela and Rod walked out the door, I saw Rod put his hand on my sister's butt. "Hey, don't you touch my sister!" I called. As Gwen and I watched them drive away, I felt something on my butt. Probably a bug. I slapped it away. I closed the door. "What a dickhead," I said.  
But Gwen, who was holding her right hand in her left and rubbing it, was all starry eyes. "Whatta babe," she said, smiling at me. "I like a man who's not afraid to go for what he wants."  
"Good for you. Now come on, my art assignment is due in on Monday!" 


	8. Fantasy

Chapter 8 - "Fantasy" - Gwen's Story  
October 20, 1999 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
"Everybody, Backstreet's back all right!" I sang along with the radio, as I pulled up outside TJ's house. We were becoming soooo close, like, today, I didn't even tell him I was visiting, I just turned up. He would be so pleased to see me. I could feel fell his attraction growing, the problem was, it was growing too slowly. The Halloween dance was in just over a week and TJ hadn't asked me yet. No one had asked me, probably because they knew TJ wanted me. Everyone knew TJ wanted me, everyone that is, except TJ. I hopped out of my pink cadillac, checking my reflection in the side mirror. I was such a babe. No wonder TJ and I made such a great couple. I picked a flower from the garden and put it in my hair. Romance was definitely in the air. As I approached the house I heard TJ and his sister Michaela singing loudly inside. I smiled. A chance to get TJ away from his invasive sister.  
I rang the doorbell. A few seconds later Michaela opened the door. She was wearing jeans and a red top with a matching ribbon in her hair. Totally underdressed if you asked me. After all, TJ was in the house. "Gwen?" she asked, surprised and a little annoyed. "What are you doing here?"  
"I was bored," I said dramatically, walking into the house. "I thought TJ could do with some company."  
Michaela shut the door. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her roll her eyes. "Actually Gwen, we were just working on our composition assignment for music...."  
"Kay? Who was at the door?" TJ called from upstairs.  
"Gwen," Michaela answered with a slightly bitter tone to her voice.  
"Right," TJ didn't sound all that excited.  
"Do you want me to bring her up?" Michaela asked.  
There was a pause. "Yeah, why not?"  
I smiled smugly at Michaela as we walked up the stairs. I couldn't wait to see the inside of TJ's room. Michaela pushed open a door and we walked in. It was clearly a girl's room, clearly Michaela's room. Damn!  
"Hi Gwen!" TJ said brightly. "Why'd you come over?" He laughed. "Not that I'm being rude or anything...."  
I batted my eyelashes and smiled sweetly. "I wanted to see you... I thought you might be bored."  
"Oh no, Michaela and I were working on our music assignment," TJ said.  
"Well, you can keep on doing it and I'll just sit and listen," I said, sitting myself down on Michaela's bed.  
Michaela sat down next to TJ and the small, black keyboard. "Of course you can sit down Gwen," she said.  
"Huh?" I said, confused. I looked at Michaela. She was such a bitch. She was kinda fat too, like a size four, or six or something. She obviously had no regard for her body whatsoever. And where did she get off, sitting so close to TJ, when he was clearly MY boyfriend? She obviously thought he liked her more than me, just because she had high cheek bones and naturally blond hair. Bitch. I stood up, and walked around the room. Michaela had a few posters on her wall, mostly of bands, ones I didn't like too. Some of the posters were way old, like two years old or something and some of the posters were really new. Like, what did she do for the two years in between, that's what I wanted to know. Did she go live in a cave or something?  
I walked over to Michaela's dresser. She had a few photos stuck around the mirror. There were photos of Michaela as a little girl and photos of this old lady. There were also a few photographs (taken a few years ago, cause she was almost as tall as TJ) of her and TJ. It was weird. They looked so alike.... There were also a few tubes of makeup on the dresser.  
I walked over to the closet and opened the doors. Michaela had so many clothes, almost as many as I did. They weren't very good though... not a lot of pink. I checked out the book shelf. There were some old Sweet Valley books, a few really boring looking books, some text books.... There was also this blue folder. I opened it. There were tonnes of pages of writing. I read the heading, 'Tweedle-Tay and His Evil Twin'....  
"Gwen! What are you doing?" TJ asked.  
"Reading," I said, holding up the folder. "Do you like Manson too Michaela?"  
You should have seen the looks on TJ's and Michaela's faces. "Gwen, would you stop going through my stuff?" Michaela said, sounding extremely pissed off.  
"It's none of your business. I can't believe you'd be so rude!" Even TJ was angry.  
"Whatever," I shrugged. "It's just a story, no need to bite my head off. I'm bored."  
"Don't you have anyone else to bother?" Michaela asked.  
"I wanted to see TJ," I explained.  
"Well I can see we're not going to get anything done tonight," Michaela said. She turned and whispered something in TJ's ear.  
"We can leave the assignment until tomorrow anyway," TJ said, a little more friendly.  
"So, Michaela, why aren't you with Rod?" I asked, sitting on the bed again.  
She gave me a funny look. "I don't have to be with him ALL the time."  
"If I were dating him I would be," I commented. "What's he like?"  
"He's okay I guess..." Michaela warmed to the subject. "I mean, he's really cute, but, I don't know... There isn't much conversation."  
"He hasn't learnt to talk yet," TJ joked.  
"But when you're with someone like Rod there doesn't need to be much conversation," I said. "You can do other stuff."  
Michaela acknowledged me with a little smile. "But there still has to be conversation. I've only known Rod for a week or two and we're always running out of things to say. I mean sure, Rod likes to talk about his car and hip hop and basketball, yada yada yada, but it isn't all that interesting. On the other hand, I've spent years alone with TJ and we still managed to talk.... most of the time."  
"So, you're saying you'd date TJ if he wasn't your brother?" I asked, suspiciously.  
"Uh well, I don't know," Michaela said hastily, looking at TJ for support.  
"Well, I think Rod's really gorgeous, and I'd love to date someone like him," I said enviously.  
TJ groaned. "Rod. Rod. Rod. Who gives a fuck about Rod? Michaela, doesn't like Rod, Gwen, does like Rod - why doesn't Michaela give Rod to Gwen?"  
"No!" Michaela said quickly. "I do like Rod!"  
"Besides," I added, looking TJ meaningfully, "I like someone else."  
"Really?" TJ looked surprised. "You never told me that."  
"You never asked," I replied.  
"Well, you really should go for it!" TJ said enthusiastically.  
There was a silence. "Do you want to play a game of 'what if'?" I asked.  
Michaela shrugged. "What's that?"  
"Well, if your life was absolutely perfect, what would a typical day be like?" I explained.  
The twins were enthusiastic. "Cool!" TJ said.  
"I'll go first," I said. TJ and Michaela moved across the room so that they were leaning against the dresser. "Well..."  
  
******************  
  
"Gwen! Gwen! It's time for your daily weigh-in!" David Hasselholf called from across the office.  
Gwen Mendelson walked obligingly over to the scales and stepped on. "Very good Gwen," David said, sounding impressed. "You only weigh 92 pounds and ten of those are the breast implants you got last month. You mustn't have been eating much...."  
Gwen smiled. "No, I only ate a packet of raisons and some celery sticks yesterday."  
"It shows," David said, patting Gwen's backside. "Keep up the good work. You have an interview with TVHits now, in the next room."  
Gwen walked into the Green room and adjusted her red swimsuit before sitting down. She smiled when she saw the male reporter looking at her with awe.  
"Gwen!" the reporter said excitedly. "We just had to tell you. You've been voted the Hottest Woman on Earth for the third year in a row. How does that feel?"  
"Well, some people say that Baywatch isn't hard work and too much focus is placed on the body, but it really is hard and expensive to look like this," Gwen said, nodding enthusiastically.  
"Gwen, do you have any idea how desired you are? This year's hottest man, Nick Carter, said that you'd be his ideal woman. Would he be your ideal man?" The reporter continued.  
"While Nick is certainly desirable, I'm seeing someone," Gwen said, thinking of her boyfriend, the love of her life. He was so beautiful, with his long blond hair, deep blue eyes, good bone structure, and symmetrical face.  
"There's also been much discussion about your newly enlarged breasts, have you had implants?"  
"No. It's all me. It's the Miracle Bra. Miracle Bra, that's the real secret."  
  
******************  
  
I finished the story with a big smile on my face.  
"That's the guy you like?" Michaela asked.  
"Who is he?" TJ asked.  
"I can't tell you," I said, mysteriously.  
"Well then," TJ said, looking pissed off. "I guess I'll take my turn then..."  
  
*******************  
  
Tweedle-Tay Manson walked down the red carpet, waving to all his screaming fans. Some were screaming screams of joy, happy to see their idol, but some were annoyed when they saw the girl he was with. Tweedle- Tay's career had had a miraculous recovery since his disappearance from the music scene five years ago. Although Tweedle-Tay was now a solo artist, he had almost as many fans as he did when he was part of Manson.  
Tweedle-Tay and his girlfriend walked into the auditorium, where they took their seats. He was so excited, he had been nominated for five Grammy Awards. While he was happy to be nominated, the excitement mostly stemmed from the chance of winning an award. He looked around him at all of his favourite musicians. No Doubt, Jewel, Alanis Morissette..... They were now not only people to admire, but competitors. He saw Aretha Franklin several rows in front and got a little too excited. He clutched his girlfriend's hand and smiled.  
The night drew on and Tweedle-Tay had not won any awards. Finally his last nomination was called. Cameron Diaz was up on the stage. "The nominees for Song of the Year are Alanis Morissette, Bob Dylan, Savage Garden and Tweedle-Tay Manson." She paused. "And the winner is..... Tweedle-Tay Manson!"  
Tweedle-Tay pretended to look shocked and walked up onto the stage to accept his award. "Hi!" he said. "I can't believe this is happening to me. There are so many people I'd like to thank. Obviously not my parents, nor my brother Neuton, but I would like to thank my fans and the people who worked on the record. And thank you God. But most of all I'd like to thank my girlfriend, the one who understands me best. When I've been at my lowest points she was there to support me, and now she's here to enjoy the good parts too. Thank you darling, I love you and I hope we spend another five years together!"  
  
*******************  
  
"That is the most beautiful story," I told TJ, trying to hold back my tears. He loved me just as much as I loved him! I looked at Michaela. She looked decidedly uncomfortable and was twisting her hair and biting her lip. Why did she have such a problem with my relationship with TJ?  
"Glad you liked it," TJ said.  
"It's your turn now," I told Michaela.  
"Oh, right," she said. "You know what Gwen, I really don't feel like playing."  
"Why not?" I asked. "Are you jealous?"  
Michaela looked confused. "Of who?"  
"Of me," I said, as though it was obvious.  
"Why would I be jealous of you, Gwen? Look, I'm tired, it's 11:30pm. Shouldn't you be leaving now?" Michaela said impatiently.  
"It's 11:30? Oh my god! I'm not allowed to drive the car after 11pm!" I said, as though I had not planned this all along.  
"Well, that's a problem, isn't it?" Michaela said, pretending she didn't know where I was heading.  
"I guess I'll have to stay here...." I continued.  
"You can stay in Michaela's room," TJ suggested.  
"No!" Michaela said quickly. "I mean, there's not enough room. You can stay in one of the spare rooms, okay?"  
"Okay," I said nonchalantly.  
"I'll just go set up," Michaela said, walking out of the room.  
"So TJ," I said, "have you heard about the Halloween Dance?"  
"Yeah, Michaela's going with Rod. Who are you going with?" he replied.  
"No one. At the moment. Say, TJ, since I'm not going with anyone and you're not going with anyone, why don't we go together?" I continued. TJ looked surprised. "As friends," I added.  
"Okay. If that's what you want. But Gwen, you really should ask that guy you like. I'll bet he'd say yes," TJ said, not sounding altogether enthusiastic.  
"Oh no, I'd rather go with you," I said, touching TJ's hair. It was soooo soft. My heart fluttered.  
TJ shrugged. "Whatever. Who do you like anyway?"  
"TJ, I love -" I began.  
Michaela walked into the room. "Gwen, I set the room up. Come on, I'll show you where it is."  
Damn that girl! Why'd she have to spoil everything? 


	9. Popular

Chapter 9 - "Popular" - Michaela's Story  
October 29, 1999 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
I touched the pretty aqua silk of my dress and twirled around in front of the mirror. It was the night of the Halloween Dance which was, according to Cordelia, the biggest social event so far this school year (the prom was the best event of the previous year). "I love the tiara," my friend Victoria said, standing up, "It really makes you look like a fairy princess."  
Victoria, who was dressed as Juliet, was getting ready at my house because her boyfriend Jimmy lived in Brentwood, so it was easier for him to drive to my house than the Valley. I was going to meet Rod at the dance because he had other things to do. Gwen was going with Tweedle-Tay and wanted to get ready at our house, but I'd managed to make some excuse as to why she couldn't. Did that girl have no friends?  
"Jimmy's going to be here in ten minutes," Victoria said, plaiting a few strands of her ash brown hair. "Did I tell you what he bought me last week?"  
"Uh, no," I lied.  
"He bought me a whole box of red m'n'ms because red symbolises love. How sweet! And yesterday he gave me the cutest little tickle-me-Elmo, because he says that when I laugh I shake like Elmo," Victoria said.  
"Mmmmm," I said, absent mindedly. Gwen was really starting to annoy me. She was always coming over to our house and making suggestive comments towards my brother. What was her problem? She did have one friend, Dominique, and they were always pestering Tay and sitting around him at lunch. It was really preventing him from making friends. No guy wanted to be surrounded by ugly bimbos like Gwen and Dominique and no girl wanted to be seen with a guy who'd lower himself to hanging around Gwen. Sometimes my brother was too nice for his own good.  
"Michaela?" Victoria asked.  
"Oh, I agree totally. Jimmy is really sweet," I said, flashing a smile.  
"Well, yeah. AND he looks just like Leonardo DiCaprio," Victoria gushed.  
I couldn't see how this could be true because Jimmy was Asian, but I nodded. "How long have you been dating him for?"  
"Eleven months," Victoria replied.  
"Don't you ever get sick of each other?"  
Victoria looked confused. "No! Don't be silly Michaela!" She sighed. "I guess you wouldn't understand, you haven't experience true love like I have."  
"No," I said softly to myself. The doorbell rang. Victoria and I ran down the stairs.  
"How does my hair look?" she asked.  
"Shocking," I said, pretending to be disgusted. Victoria frowned and walked over to the hall mirror. I opened the door, expecting to see Jimmy. It was Gwen. She was wearing this short, fluro pink dress, pink stilettos, pink streaks in her hair and about a foot of makeup. "Hi Gwen," I said, trying to look cheerful as she walked in and I shut the door.  
"Oh Michaela! The most awful thing has happened! My car broke down so my parents had to drive me to your house so I could go to the dance with you guys!" Gwen was all wide eyes and fake sadness.  
"Wouldn't it have made more sense for them to drop you off at the dance?" I asked, seeing through Gwen's excuse.  
Gwen had no answer. Victoria walked over and stuck her tongue out at me. "Liar," she said. She looked at Gwen and made a face. "Gwen, you do know this is meant to be fancy dress?"  
Gwen laughed and flicked her hair. "Of course."  
I raised my eyebrows. "Well, what are you going as?"  
"Barbie!" Gwen said, giggling.  
"But you look no different than you usually do....." Victoria said, pretending to be confused.  
There was a silence. "Michaela, where's your brother?" Gwen said, shortly.  
"Um, I don't know. Probably -" I began. Tweedle-Tay walked out into the hall. He was wearing these tight leather pants and DKNY shirt. "Speak of the devil."  
"Hi Gwen! What are you doing here?" Tweedle-Tay asked.  
"Oh TJ! It's the most -" Gwen began melodramatically. The doorbell rang. I quickly opened the door. It was Jimmy.  
"Hi Hercules!" Victoria cooed embracing him.  
"Hi Elmo!" Jimmy and Victoria began to kiss.  
I looked up at the clock. "Oh my! The dance is going to start in ten minutes and it's a half-hour drive to school. Maybe we should be leaving now......" I gestured for Gwen and Tay to walk outside. Victoria and Jimmy quickly followed.  
  
************************  
  
'Ooh la la la! I love you baby! Ooh la la la la.....'  
The PA system blared throughout the hall. I looked around me at the tacky carved pumpkins and cardboard cutouts out witches and ghosts. I grimaced. Jimmy and Victoria were slow dancing to Alexia and Gwen was talking to Dominique over by the punchbowl. Luckily for Tweedle-Tay, he was with his friends Jonathan and David, rather than with Gwen. The entire set-up was totally tacky. Although it had been years since I went to school in Beverly Hills, I was sure things were much better there. "Kay! Kay! Over here!" I turned around to see Jenny, who was dressed as Buffy the vampire slayer making her way towards me.  
"Hi Jen," I said. "Have you seen Rod?"  
"No," she said, taking my arm. "But don't worry, you'll find him eventually, he's crazy about you. The girls are over here."  
Jenny and I walked over to Cordelia, Maria and Kristy who were sitting down and trying (desperately hard) to look stylish in such lowly circumstances. We all said hi. "Have you seen Brad yet?" Kristy asked, adjusting her Xena costume. "He said he'd spare a few dance for me but - you know how popular he is with the girls....."  
"No," Maria replied.  
"Well at least someone is sparing a dance for you. I've only been asked to dance once tonight and that was by a ninth grader," Cordelia said bitterly, studying her nails.  
"Ooooo - how cute!" Jenny squealed.  
I looked around the hall for Rod. I couldn't see him anywhere......  
"Are you looking for Rod?" Cordelia asked. I nodded. "Well he is here. I know because I danced with him earlier. I don't know why he's not looking for you......" she said, looking concerned.  
"I thought you said you'd only been asked by a ninth grader?" I said, biting my lip.  
"Oh! I guess I forgot Rod. You don't mind do you?" Cordelia said, innocently.  
"No, it's fine. It's not like Rod and I have a totally serious relationship." I shook my head.  
"I wouldn't be trusting Cordelia with Rod if I were you," Jenny muttered.  
Tweedle-Tay walked over. "Hi," he said.  
"Hi TJ," Kristy said flirtatiously. "Would you like to dance?"  
Tweedle-Tay looked surprised. "But I'm going with Gwen."  
"Oh," Kristy said. "I didn't know you were seeing her."  
"Oh no, we're just friends," Tweedle-Tay said quickly.  
"TJ, you are aware that this is fancy dress?" Cordelia said critically.  
"Yeah," he said.  
"Then who are you going as?" Maria asked, joining in.  
"Tweedle-Tay Manson. You know, from that old band Manson. People say I look like him," he said with what he thought to be a dazzling smile. I had to stop myself from laughing. My brother placed so much importance on himself. He actually thought that people remembered his alter-ego.  
"Yeah, you do," Jenny said nodding.  
"Mmmmm. I used to like him when I was fourteen. I thought he was way cool," Kristy said, taking my brother's arm.  
"Really?" Tweedle-Tay said, somewhat surprised, as they walked onto the dance floor.  
I smiled to myself and sat down. If Tay had to go out with someone, Kristy was a lot better than Gwen. Gwen came rushing over. "Where'd he go?"  
"The blue bird I should follow?" Jenny asked absentmindedly. We all looked at her, confused. "Never mind, intellectual joke!"  
"My boyfriend! That ugly slut has stolen my boyfriend!" Gwen protested.  
"But Gwen, you can't steal your own boyfriend," Cordelia said innocently.  
"And you're right here," Maria added.  
"What boyfriend?" Jenny asked.  
"My brother is not your boyfriend, and Kristy is not ugly," I replied.  
"She's a lot prettier than you," Maria added.  
"Not that that's hard," Cordelia said giggling. We all laughed.  
Gwen frowned. "You guys are such bitches!" she screamed. "You think you are so cool just because you're all pretty and thin and wear nice clothes and have boyfriends and are cheerleaders and every guy in school wants to go to bed with you! But you know, that's only what YOU think!" A crowd began to form around Gwen. "Everyone else here knows what sluts you all are and most of the guys here would rather date someone like me! My friends and I are way prettier! Just because you make up your own little clique and don't let anyone else in unless they are new and look like some sort of model - because you couldn't be seen with people you initially reject - doesn't make you all desirable! It just makes you bitches! And now you have the nerve to take the only guy I've ever loved and give him to yourselves! I don't get you! You can have guys like Rod!" At this point I spotted Rod in the crowd and waved nervously to him. "Why the fuck do you have to take guys like TJ? Why do you have to take the sweet, beautiful, people and mold them into copies of yourselves? WHY DON'T YOU ALL JUST GET FUCKED! GET FUCKED!!! GET FUCKED!!!" Gwen looked at us with her tear filled eyes.  
Rod put his arm around Gwen and stuck his tongue in her ear. "Gwen," he said, resting his hand on her chest. "You can have guys like me. You just have to be willing to..... compromise."  
I saw Gwen's painfully skinny body tense. "GET FUCKED!!!!!" She screamed. The crowd laughed. I bit my lip and looked around for my brother. He was Gwen's only male friend and, while he probably weighed thirty pounds less than Rod, was Gwen's only hope of escape. I saw Tweedle- Tay and looked at him desperately. Gwen slapped Rod in the face and cried even harder. "I hate you! I hate you all! Why don't you stand up to those bitches! Why the fuck don't you! If every one did they wouldn't be exclusive by choice, they'd have no friends!" Gwen pushed her way through the crowd, being spat on by several guys along the way. I grimaced. As she made her way out of the hall I saw my brother following her to comfort her. At least she had one friend.  
"What a drama queen!" Cordelia said. The crowd nodded in agreement. "Talk about over-reacting. Kristy and TJ are allowed to dance if they want. It's not like anyone here is married or anything!" She laughed. Maria and Jenny laughed along, nervously.  
I looked down at my dress. I felt an arm around my shoulders. "Don't worry about Gwen, she's a slut. You saw the way she was cracking onto me," Rod said gently.  
I looked up into Rod's eyes, with confusion. "Come with me, I'll take you for a drive," he said with an uncharacteristic kindness.  
"I think I'm going to be sick!" I said, quickly getting up. I pushed my way through the crowd in a daze and stumbled out of the hall, snapping the heel of my shoe in the process. Walking outside, I saw Gwen and Tweedle-Tay sitting side by side on the hall steps. Maybe there was something between them. I wouldn't know. I walked over to them and sat on the other side of my brother. Gwen was sobbing, her head on Tweedle-Tay's lap and he was patting her rough hair. I wanted to cry, so badly, but I couldn't. Tay obviously loved Gwen, and I was sure that a girlfriend was more important to him than a sister. They would think I was just trying to get sympathy.  
"Hey Kay," he said. "Are you okay?"  
"Sure Tay," I said, smiling weakly.  
"Where's Rod? Shouldn't you be with him?" Tweedle-Tay continued.  
I shrugged. "He's inside."  
"Why aren't you inside?" he whispered.  
"I don't think I have to answer that question Tay," I said. Luckily, Gwen didn't notice my slip-up. I sighed and rested my head on my brother's shoulder.  
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked again.  
I nodded.  
"You don't look okay," he continued.  
"I'm fine!" I protested, lifting my head. I felt dizzy and the world began to spin. "Absolutely, posit -" I began, but I couldn't finish because my dinner had come out onto the grass. I moaned.  
"Yeah Kay, you're fine," Tweedle-Tay said, moving away slightly. "Absolutely, positively, fine."  
  
********************  
  
Meanwhile, in Tulsa.......  
  
"Mom! I don't want to take Elizabeth, Kestrel and MacArthy trick-or- treating!" Grubbery complained.  
"I don't want him to take us either!" Elizabeth said, pouting. "I'm eleven! I can look after Kess and Mackie, we'll be fine!"  
"Yeah, they'll be fine." For once, Grubbery was actually supporting his younger sister's pleas.  
"Besides, Grubbery is totally uncool," Elizabeth whispered in her mother's ear. "He listens to all that grunge stuff, which is like, so seven years ago!"  
Fergie Manson shook her head. "Elizabeth, it's not that I don't trust you. Tulsa is a big, dangerous city - we have 400 000 people. In that many people there are sure to be a few psychopaths, Grubbery is old enough to protect you, you're only a little girl."  
"Well there is one psychopath in this very room Mom, so I guess I see what you mean," Elizabeth said, looking at Grubbery.  
"Mom, when you say psychopath, do you mean the sort of people that would lock their children in an attic?" Grubbery mused, tying his hair into a ponytail.  
"Don't be smart with me Grubbery!" Fergie said, pissed off. "I'd take the kids trick-or-treating but I'm pregnant and my back hurts."  
"Well it's not my fault you've never heard of contraception! I hope you get the message after you've had your - what is it? Ninth," Grubbery snapped.  
Elizabeth counted on her fingers and nodded. "We do only have three bedrooms you know," she said.  
"Grubbery! Elizabeth! Get ready, you ALL have to go out!" Fergie said sternly, motioning her children up the stairs.  
"Tweedle-Tay didn't have to go trick-or-treating when he was fourteen!" Grubbery called.  
"That's because he was - just go!" Fergie screamed. She sat down and sighed. Grubbery had been such a delinquent since he found out about the twins. He wasn't listening to pop music at all and was cursing. He was yelling at his parents too and fighting with his brothers and sisters sometimes, over things like what to watch on television. We was being a very naughty boy indeed. But the thing that worried Fergie most was, Grubbery had taken up listening to the music of her estranged cousin, Marilyn. Who knew what sort of Satanic rituals he might get involved in? Fergie's worst fears were conformed when her children returned from upstairs. Grubbery was dressed in....... black. 


	10. Go West

Chapter 10 -"Go West" - Tweedle-Tay's Story  
November 8, 1999 - San Fernando Valley, California  
"I'm only happy when it rains. Let me tell you 'bout my new obsession. I'm riding high upon a deep depression. I'm only happy when it rains!" Michaela sang, skipping down the school hall towards our lockers. She turned back to me and smiled. "I used to like that song but I think it's stupid now. The rain sucks. I hate the cold and wet!"  
"I'm sure there's some sort of sexual reference there, but I can't think of one right now," I mused. There had been torrential rain in LA for the past four days. Streets were flooded, trees had fallen over and my sister was actually wearing pants. "What are you going to do for our music prac next week?"  
"I don't know. Maybe 'Ask For It'," Michaela replied mischievously. She shook her head. "No, I'll probably sing 'Foolish Games'. That's my favourite song to sing at the moment. What about you?"  
"I think I'll do an old Manson song, 'Strange' or something," I said, seriously.  
Michaela's eyes widened. She lowered her voice. "You can't be serious! Not only might you give away who you really are but you'll look like such a teenybopper!" She stopped at her locker.  
"Well, I'm glad you feel that way about my compositions."  
"Just do a classical piece. You're good on the piano and you'll probably get higher marks," Michaela suggested, opening her locker and removing her physics book. We began to walk down the hallway towards my locker.  
Michaela could be so mean about Manson sometimes. If she wasn't so pretty and bubbly and my twin sister I'd want to shoot her for it. Just because I'd had screaming girls after me and done regular interviews with Smash Hits didn't mean that my songs weren't good. They just happened to be popular. Like Michaela. She was popular, but that didn't make her a bitch, even if Gwen did say so. And you'd think that Gwen would be a little bit more appreciative, seeing as my sister had abandoned all her friends at the Halloween dance to comfort Gwen. Speaking of Gwen, she was standing by my locker, looking extremely shocked.  
"Oh TJ!" she squealed. "Michaela," she acknowledged. "The most awful thing has happened!" Gwen pointed towards my locker. Scrawled in pink lipstick were the words 'isn't it queer'.  
Michaela giggled. "That's pretty lame, Gwen. Isn't that your shade of lipstick? Fruchsia?"  
"Queer? I don't get it," I said, shaking my head.  
Gwen frowned. "Michaela, that is not my lipstick. I wear 'Pink Passion', thank you. TJ, it's the most awful rumour! People have been saying that you're..... gay! I've been trying to set them straight by telling them about us, but - they have a pretty strong case. They pointed out that we've never had any physical contact, and your hair, and your tight pants and lack of girlfriend. There's nothing I can do to make them believe me!"  
"Oh my god!" I said softly, crossing myself. I was not gay. Michaela wasn't a guy. That was proof enough, wasn't it? I looked at my sister. "Michaela, tell Gwen I'm not gay," I ordered her.  
Michaela looked innocent. "But how would I know that?" She smiled. "Gwen, my brother isn't gay."  
I smiled with relief. "Gwen, relax. I'm sure this will be over soon."  
"No TJ. I don't think it will be. We'll have to be more public about our affections. I'll be your girlfriend. No one will say you're gay then!" Gwen was enthusiastic. She walked over and put her arm around my waist. "We look good together, don't we?" she said.  
Michaela shook her head. "Not really. The colouring's all wrong...."  
I removed Gwen's arm and smiled at her. "Gwen, while I'm very touched by your proposal, it's really not necessary."  
"But TJ!" Gwen whined. "I - I - I -" Gwen sighed. "Never mind. It's not important."  
There was a silence. The bell rang. "I'd better go to physics," Michaela said, which was unusual as she was always late to class. "See ya!" She walked away quickly.  
I looked at Gwen. She was so enthusiastic about us pretending to be a couple. Maybe she liked me. I didn't think so. The very idea of it entering my mind was ridiculous. How up myself was I? But it was possible. "I have art," I said quickly. "Later!"  
"Later TJ!" Gwen said sadly. As I walked away I heard Gwen talking to a sophomore named Julie. "Have you heard about TJ?" Gwen was saying. Gwen was so nice, trying to fix up the situation for me. She was a really good friend, but she was no Michaela. 


	11. If We Sleep Together

Chapter 11 - "If we sleep together, will I like you  
better?" - Michaela's Story  
January 22nd, 2000 - San Fernando Valley, California  
  
"'Desperate, But Not Serious', starring Claudia Schiffer and Christine Taylor", the screen read. I picked up my coke and took a sip. Rod was taking me to the movies to see something with his favourite model in it. I saw him lean forward to take in the close-up on Claudia Schiffer's ..... hmmm. Right. Whatever.  
I leant back into my seat and rolled my eyes. I'd been dating Rod for three months now, and we were actually getting along pretty well. I mean, we weren't exactly best friends or anything but we knew each other pretty well. As well as you'd know anyone you hung out with once a week and spoke to a little, anyway. We were like acquaintances..... acquaintances who happened to make out as well. I didn't want anything more than that anyway, at least not with Rod. Rod was only Rod and not especially intelligent or deep. I know this sounds really bitchy, but if someone better came along, I'd dump him in a second. I was sure he'd do the same.  
At any rate, we made a better couple than Tweedle-Tay and Gwen, who were still in some sort of limbo. Gwen was madly infatuated with Tay and he was still totally oblivious. He was probably just pretending so that he didn't have to tell Gwen he wasn't interested. Gwen had given up on spreading the gay rumours, which had gotten her absolutely nowhere, and was now playing the sweet, innocent, girl next door. It was almost pitiful. You'd think she'd have given up by now.  
Tweedle-Tay was doing really well at school as well. So well that I was kind of jealous. He came first in music and I only came third. He also came just one place behind me in English. I know I should have been pleased for him, but I was supposed to be the smart one in our family. I'd helped him out in all these subjects and now he was almost overtaking me in them. He was supposed to be in awe of my intelligence, not finally understanding that the world wasn't created in seven days and that there was a phenomenon called evolution.  
But, you know, I was doing well too. I'd gotten straight A's and I'd come first in Math and top ten in everything else. But still, I was supposed to be the smarter twin. He was the cuter twin, I was the smarter twin. That was the way it worked at our house. How dare he try to steal my place! I tensed my hand and felt my packet of chips crush. I winced. Rod looked over at me. I smiled and shrugged. He went back to ogling at Claudia Schiffer. I rolled my eyes and smiled. I was so silly! Of course Tay was as smart as I was - we were twins. That meant I was as cute as he was. Good. We could be equally good. Being equally good was way better than being better or having someone better than you, because you felt neither guilty, nor pathetic. I sat up again, pleased with myself.  
I finally turned my attention to the screen. Claudia was playing a beautiful, but klutzy romantic heroine who was having problems finding love. As if! Claudia Schiffer could have whoever she wanted! Why did they make characters in movies so beautiful anyway? It wasn't like anyone was that pretty anyway, or at least no one I knew was. Claudia was meeting the guy she was obviously going to end up with. Brad Pitt. Guys weren't that good looking in real life, and if they were even nearly so good looking, they certainly weren't very nice. Not in my experience, anyway.  
Claudia was being picked up now. I wished I had her problems in love. She was better off than anyone I knew. I felt something wet in my ear. Rod's tongue. I grimaced. I had to get around to telling Rod that that was off, not sexy. I mean, who wants to get ear wax in their mouth? I turned to Rod. "Rod, I'm trying to watch the movie," I said sweetly, making my eyes wide. "Could you leave it for later?"  
Rod looked surprised, but nodded. "Sure babe," he said.  
I smiled to myself and leant back down into my seat.  
  
**************************  
  
Claudia and Brad rode off into the sunset. How romantic. How unrealistic. In real life, if they were such a perfect couple, and looked so good together and were really well suited, there'd be something in the way, like he'd die, or be psychopathic, or he wouldn't like her. Movies could be so dumb. Rod turned to me. "What a chick-flick," he said.  
How ironic. Rod took me to see a film that I didn't like and he didn't like either. "'Chicks' don't always like fluffy crap," I said.  
"Ooooo, someone's in a bad mood tonight," Rod said. "No movie make- out and now this? Is it that time of the month?"  
Rod and I got out of our seats and began to walk out of the theatre. I didn't have my period, but an excuse was an excuse. "Yeah, I've got such awful cramps," I whined.  
Rod put his arm around me sympathetically. "Poor Michaela," he said. "You know what they say makes those cramps better?"  
We walked out of the Valley Mall into the car park. "Oh Rod, you know I hate sport!"  
Rod smiled. "No, no. We'll go back to my house first and I'll make you a hot chocolate," he said, opening the car door for me to hop in.  
Rod was so considerate. I unlocked his side of the car for him and touched the smooth leather seats of the car. It must have cost a fortune. A show-off car for sure. Rod hopped in. "Thanks," I said. "Can I have TimTams too?" I asked.  
"Anything for you," Rod replied.  
"Cool," I said, adjusting the radio station from techno central to a station that was playing MMMPop. Sure, the song sucked, but it brought back memories of a happier, more innocent time. Innocence was dead now.  
"Oh Kay, what are you doing playing this teenybopper shit?" Rod complained. We drove out of the car park.  
I smiled sweetly. "It brings back memories....."  
"You are a sicko! What sort of person would make out to a bunch of guys that look like girls?" Rod was disgusted.  
I frowned. Rod was the one with the sick mind, not me. "I didn't make out to it, and they don't look like girls. Those are my bro-" I stopped myself and bit my lip.  
Rod smiled. "You look so cute when you're angry." He looked at me again. "You know, you look heaps like the middle one."  
"So now you say I look like a guy!?!" I gasped. "What sort of friend are you?"  
"I'm sorry. You don't look anything like him." Rod looked annoyed and sped up the car.  
"Right. He's a guy, I'm a girl, and we're not even distantly related."  
  
*************************  
  
"Hi Michaela," Mrs. Rilkens said, as Rod and I walked into the kitchen. She was really pretty, with long light brown hair and blue eyes. She only looked about thirty, although she was actually forty-five. Of course, living in LA, she'd probably had a few routine facelifts and liposuctions, but still....  
"Hi, Mrs. Rilkens," I said, smiling. I sat down at the kitchen table.  
"Hi Mom," Rod said, sitting down as well. "Get Michaela a hot chocolate and TimTams."  
I raised my eyebrows, as did Rod's mother. "I'm not your slave, Rod," she said. "Why don't you get Michaela a hot chocolate, I'm going to go and watch 'NYPD Blue'." She picked up a cup of tea from the bench and walked towards the door. "Don't stay up to late, okay? And make sure you're taking Michaela home by 11pm honey, I don't want any funny business going on in my house." She left the room.  
"Sure Mom," Rod said, rolling his eyes. He turned to me. "We should have gone to your house."  
"No," I said, surprised. What did Rod mean? "I like your house. It's nice......."  
Rod got up and began to boil milk. "We'll go up to my room once I've finished making this, okay?"  
"Sure......"  
Rod and I sat for a few minutes in silence. Finally the milk boiled and Rod fixed the hot chocolate. I stood up and walked over to the bench. "Thanks," I said, taking the mug and TimTams. I flinched from the heat of the mug. Rod started to walk out of the kitchen and I followed.  
"Why'd you get so annoyed about the Manson references earlier?" he asked. "Did you have a crush on them or something?"  
"No!" I said, a little too quickly. "I mean, I just think that, you know, Neuton was a real jerk but Tweedle-Tay was cool and Grubbery was sweet, in an non-sexual way, of course."  
Rod opened up the door to his bedroom and I walked in and settled myself on his black desk chair. "I think the Manson's were really scarily goody-goody and the middle one was definitely a girl." He sat down on his bed.  
I didn't know what to say. I mean, Rod was half-right (in the goody- goody bit), but he was also Rod and I didn't want to give hit private info about my family. "Well, I think the children themselves were okay, but I think that maybe something weird was going on with their parents," I said carefully, dipping my biscuit into my hot chocolate.  
Rod actually looked thoughtful for a second and then smiled. "You're right. They were all so blonde and....." Rod paused in thought.  
"Puritanical?" I suggested.  
"What does that mean?"  
"Religious in an extreme and bad way," I said, simply, for Rod.  
"Yeah. Anyway, it was just too good to be true." Rod looked at me and smiled. "You are so smart Michaela."  
"Thanks," I said, smiling. "Why would you say that?"  
"You use all these long words and you can figure out stuff about people," he explained. He shifted on the bed. "Come and sit down," he said, motioning for me to come over.  
I gave a little smile and sat down next to Rod. "You are so pretty Michaela," Rod said awkwardly. See - there was another thing about Rod. He was supposed to be really good looking and experienced and all that, but, well while he certainly was experienced (if he was a girl, he'd be labeled a slut) he didn't have a lot to show for it, if you know what I mean. It was as though all those girls he'd made out with were too overcome by his popularity and power to tell him how crap he was. As for me, I couldn't be bothered. It wasn't as though I was going to be with Rod for any significant amount of time. I was just waiting for someone with substance to come along. But for now, Rod kept Tay away, and that was good enough for me.  
As usual, I began to let Rod kiss me. I shuddered when his tongue entered my mouth, remembering where it had been earlier that evening. Apart from that though, it was okay, quite nice actually. Once Rod came up with an excuse to make out, he was actually pretty good. We lay back onto the bed. I looked around Rod's room, subtly of course, because I would never want Rod to think he wasn't the most fantastic person on earth. He had so many poster of girls in swimmers on the walls and motor bikes and cars and other crap like that. Actually, I didn't have to look very hard to see all the posters, because directly above my head there was a poster of Pammie Anderson, half falling off the ceiling. God! Even Tweedle-Tay had more sense than that.  
I felt Rod's hand going underneath my shirt. Shit! What was I going to do? Obviously I wasn't prudish but Rod was Rod. I had decided that kissing a guy you were only attracted to and no more was fine but..... I looked into Rod's eyes. There was something there, in their deep blue, that I hadn't noticed before, some sort of forcefulness that was all too familiar. I yelped. Rod had Tweedle-Tay's eyes.  
Rod got up from on top of me. "What's wrong Michaela? Did I....?"  
I sat up and bit my lip. "Oh, it's not your fault Rod. I just don't want to go further."  
Rod got up off the bed and went to sit on the chair. His movements were violent. "God Michaela! What is with you? I've been going out with you for three whole months and - nothing. I mean, it's bad enough that I've had to go without sex for so long but..... You won't do anything! Are you frigid or something?" Rod was pissed off.  
How dare Rod try to make me feel guilty. I was going out with him, wasn't I? What did he expect? "Look," I sad, trying to remain calm. "I just, look, it brings back bad memories. Back when I was living in Oklahoma..... I had a really bad experience. I was in a really perverted relationship and.... I lost my virginity to the wrong guy, okay? And I really don't feel like sex or anything like it. If you have a problem with that, we can end the relationship right now, but you have to understand, I'm not going to sleep with you."  
Rod put his hands up in anger. "We weren't anywhere near sex Michaela, so don't pull that crap with me! Even if we would have had sex it wouldn't have been a problem. We've been going out for ages Michaela!"  
I rolled my eyes. "Rod, it's not going to happen tonight, or anytime.... So, you know, there are plenty of girls who would sleep with you after one night and we all know who they are, so if that's what you want, go out with them. I don't care!"  
Rod frowned. "Well, to tell you the truth, I would go out with them but -" His face softened. "You are just so pretty Michaela, and I can't see Claudia or Pammie calling me up anytime soon so we'll just leave it as it is."  
What sort of twisted compliment was that? "Well," I said carefully. "I'd best be going home now."  
"Sure," Rod said, leading the way out of the room.  
I let out a little sigh of relief. No more eye-contact, that was for sure. 


	12. C'est La Vie

Chapter 12 - "C'est la Vie*" - Tweedle-Tay's Story  
February 3rd, 2000 - San Fernando Valley, California  
  
"Oh TJ," Gwen said, smiling happily at me. "Thank you sooo much for driving me home. It's so cold today and my legs would get goose pimples if it weren't for you."  
"That's okay," I said, bending the truth just a little. "It's on the way to my house anyway."  
"But what about poor Michaela?" Gwen asked, concerned.  
"Oh, I think she's going out with Jenny and Cordelia anyway. She said something about organising the Spring Dance. Cordelia wants to be Spring Queen," I explained.  
I was giving Gwen a lift home because she thought it was too cold for her to walk. It had been sunny in the morning and she was only wearing a tiny pink slip dress - without stockings. Poor Gwen, to me it would seem obvious that it would be cold - it was winter, after all - but she did like the colour pink and pink stocking didn't look terribly stylish.  
Gwen looked at me and blinked. "Gwen, what wrong?" I asked. She looked confused. "You're blinking," I explained. "Do you have something in your eye?"  
Gwen frowned. "No, nothing's wrong," she replied. She paused. "TJ, do you think I should try out for Spring Queen?"  
We pulled up at Gwen's house. "I don't know Gwen. I mean, you're a great girl, but...... the girls that get to be Spring Queen have heaps of friends and connections...." I said. Gwen's face fell. "You could try though," I added quickly. "Well, here we are. Bye!"  
I waited for Gwen to get out of the car but she did not. "TJ," she said, plastering a smile on her hurt face. "Would you like to come into my house for afternoon tea? I've written this song that I'm sure you'll love, and, well, you do music and you're soooo smart...... I'd really like to get your opinion."  
I smiled. Gwen was so sweet. It was nice to have people admire your talent. I really took me back to the days when I had a choice of 3 million adoring girls. "Sure Gwen," I said, trying to sound cool and confident. It was like being on stage with Manson again. We got out of the car and walked inside Gwen's house. I walked into the lounge room and sat down while Gwen went to get some food for us. She returned with brownies and Pepsi. "Gwen," I said helpfully, "It's not very good to drink softdrink before you sing. You'll dry up your throat."  
Gwen blushed. "Oh no, it's okay." She flicked her hair and walked over to the tape player. See, my friends Dominique, Claire, Morgan and I are starting up this band called the Fly Girls. It's kinda like the Spice Girls were or something. Anyway, Claire and I wrote this song about the guy I like and I'd really like to sing it for you. I have the backing track in the tapedeck."  
I smiled knowingly. I knew why Gwen wanted me to hear her song. "So," I said. "You want me to hear it so you can play it for the guy you like later."  
Gwen looked confused. "Uh.... yeah," she said brightly. She pressed play and put herself in a pose. I sat back and relaxed. The music began. "Oh-oh. Oh-oh," Gwen began to sing, bounding around the room doing some sort of routine. "I said hey boy sitting in your tree, mommy always wants you to come to tea. Don't be shy, straighten up your tie, get down from your treehouse sitting in the sky. I wanna know just what to do. Is it very big? Is there room for two?"  
What sort of crap was this? Sure there was a catchy melody and all but the lyrics made no sense unless you took them as sexual innuendo. And very childish innuendo at that. Gwen's voice was a bit of a problem too. Sure, she wasn't half as bad as the girl on the plane when Michaela and I were on our way to LA, but she was running out of breath. This was understandable as it is really very hard to sing and dance at the same time, but her dancing wasn't that good and the whole thing would have looked a lot better if she'd cut it out of the routine. Oh well, at least she was in tune. Sort of.  
"Say you will, say you won't, say you'll do what I don't. Say the truth, say to me, c'est la vie! Na na na ey! Na na na oh! Na an an eh! Hey hey hey hey! Hey hey!" Gwen finished in a pose. She walked over to the tape recorder and paused to take a breath. "What do you think?" she asked.  
I patted on the lounge for her to come and sit next to me. "It's quite good," I said carefully. "It needs a little cleaning up and the dance routines should be less energetic, but you do have a melody."  
Gwen's face lit up with happiness. "So you like it?" she asked.  
"Well, you know, it's not my style, but I think whoever you wrote it for would probably love it."  
Gwen blinked again. I didn't even bother asking her if she had something in her eye, it just seemed to be a nervous habit of hers. "Cool," she said. "Did you like the brownies?"  
"Yeah, they were nice," I replied.  
Gwen's face looked pained. "Oh TJ! What IS your problem?" she said loudly.  
I looked at her blankly. "Please explain."  
Gwen moved closer to me. "This," she said impatiently. She threw herself onto me and kissed me. I coughed in shock. She sat back up, disgusted. "TJ! Are you blind? I'm in love with you!"  
Gwen was in love with me? It didn't make sense. She said she liked someone else. "You're what?" I asked.  
"I'm in love with you TJ! Can't you see we're meant to be together? We've been friends for nearly six months, and the entire time I've loved you. I've tried the subtle approached but there doesn't seem to be anyway I can get through to you. What do I have to do, to get the message through? How can I prove that I really love you? Are you gay or something? The whole time you've been in the valley you haven't cared less about any girl except that stupid sister of yours! What is you problem????" Gwen screamed, shaking me.  
Well then. Gwen wasn't a nice girl after all. She was bitch. I wasn't gay. I liked girls. I just didn't like ones with platinum blonde hair, zero intelligence, and no fashion sense. I was going to tell Gwen just that, but I wasn't like she was. "Gwen," I said calmly. "I don't have a problem. I was perfectly happy being friends with you, I just wasn't in love with you. And I'm not gay."  
"Well then, you must have no sexual feelings. You've never had a girlfriend and you don't seem to want one," Gwen said, folding her arms and pouting.  
"Fuck Gwen! I've had sex and it was with a girl! Why the fuck do you presume these things about me just because I don't want to be with you? Because Gwen, if not lusting after you makes me gay, there's not one straight guy in our school!"  
Gwen tensed and slapped me hard on the arm. "You bastard! Get out of my house! Get out of my house! You are so dumb! Get out!"  
I stood up and started to walk out of the lounge room. "I'm happy to leave, Gwen."  
She stood up and followed me, hurrying me out the door. "Get out! get out! Get out!" She opened the door and pushed me out. "Get out!" Gwen paused. "Oh, and by the way - I know who you are - TWEEDLE-TAY!"  
I almost stopped in my tracks. I had to cover myself somehow. "Yeah Gwen. Indulge yourself in your little Manson fantasies! Or then again, you could get over them!" I hopped into the car and drove away. What a bitch. Gwen certainly was no Michaela. 


	13. Don't You Know Who I Am?

Chapter 13 - "Don't You Know Who I Am?" - Michaela's Story  
February 17th, 2000 - San Fernando Valley, California  
  
"Kay!" Victoria called out. "Do you have the materials?"  
"Yah-huh!" I said. "They're in my locker. I'm just going to get them now."  
"I'll see you in the art room," she called back, walking towards the art building.  
I quickly walked down the corridor towards my locker. Cordelia wanted to be Spring Queen and our entire group had taken it on, in duty, to help her win. My friends and I were spending lunchtimes, like today, working on making posters and flyers, encouraging people to vote for Cordelia. Because Tweedle-Tay did art, he was able to 'borrow' some materials from the art rooms, which made the entire exercise cheaper for us. And so, I was keeping the materials in my locker. I got my locker key out from my bra and unlocked the door. Cardboard, paints and crayons fell out onto the floor. I scooped them up and began to carry them down the hallway. I looked down at the floor to check to see if anything was falling out of my hands. Damn! I should have gone to the bathroom first so I could have checked my hair before I saw Rod, who would also be helping on the campaign. I would have to find some way to get to the bathroom shortly after taking the materials to the art room. Maybe I could say -  
All of a sudden the materials and I were on the floor. "Shit!" I cried out, exasperated. I looked up to see a girl in baggy jeans and singlet top looking down over me. "Hi," I said awkwardly.  
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" she said, helping me up.  
"No really, it's my fault. I was in a hurry and I wasn't paying a lot of attention to where I was going," I lent down to pick up some of the art materials.  
The girl smiled. "Really? I thought people like you didn't hurry anywhere. I thought you guys were too 'cool' for that."  
I could see the stab but ignored it. "Well, you know, my friend Cordelia wants to be Spring Queen and everyone's helping her out. It's like a group project."  
"Really? It must be hard work. I mean, stuff like that is based on work and talent, not something dumb like how much money you have, or how popular you are. I can't see how being head cheerleader could help Cordelia out in a situation like Spring Queen elections... These things take real integrity," the girl picked up the remainder of the materials for me. "Bye Michaela!"  
She knew my name? "Do I know you?" I asked, confused.  
"Oh, don't feel bad. I've only been in your music class since September," the girl said sarcastically. "My name's Skye. Skye Green."  
"Oh yeah!" I said. "I DO know you. You sit behind me and TJ. You sit with, ah, Lisa and Josie and Natalie. You're the girls with the band."  
Skye rolled her eyes. "Actually, I don't sit with Natalie anymore. She left after Christmas. So now we're not exactly a band anymore. But I guess you didn't notice..... you preps are a bit too self absorbed to notice anyone but each other."  
"Sorry!" I said, pissed off. "I did only come to the school this year you know. I haven't had time to meet everyone yet." I paused. "So you've quit the band?"  
"Well, not exactly. We still jam and stuff, but it's a bit hard to get gigs. No one wants to see a band without a singer...." Skye explained.  
"So that's all you're lacking? Well, I might be able to help you out there. You know I sing?"  
Skye looked uncomfortable. "I don't know, Michaela. We're a rock band and, well, you seem like a Backstreet Boys kind of girl."  
I nearly slapped her in the face. "Yeah right! Give me some credit. Look, I'm interested in joining the band. You can take it or leave it."  
Skye looked thoughtful. "I'll talk to Lisa and Josie. We'll get back to you this afternoon in music."  
"Cool." I looked at my watch. "Shit we've been talking for ten minutes. Cordelia's going to kill me! I'd better go!"  
"Oh no! You wouldn't want to suffer Cordelia's wrath!" Skye said sarcastically.  
I ignored her and ran towards the art rooms. Everyone was already sitting round waiting for the materials. Kristy was sitting on Brad's lap, feeding him strawberries. No one looked especially pissed off that I was late, just pleased that they had an excuse not to work. I sat down between Maria and Rod. "Hi everyone!" I said, cheerfully.  
Everyone said some sort of greeting. I turned to Rod. "Guess who I was just talking to?" I asked.  
"Who?" Rod asked.  
"Skye Green," I replied.  
Rod just looked confused. "Never heard of her," he said. 


	14. Rock Star

Chapter 14 - "Rock Star" -Tweedle-Tay's Story  
March 3rd, 2000 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
"Every time that I stare into the sun...... Angel dust and my dress just comes undone...." Michaela sang into the microphone, looking every bit the angry young woman...... except for her purple, shimmery, Calvin Klein dress.  
Michaela had joined this band called 'Miss Demeanor' with some girls from our music class at school, Josie, Lisa and Skye, and I was watching their first gig. Michaela had begged me to come, even though we had a chemistry test on Monday, and I'd agreed, but I hadn't been able to get any of my friends to come, for the aforementioned reason. Michaela's friends were all here though, obviously they didn't do chemistry..... or didn't care about it. But like you would care about chemistry? I mean, it wasn't very useful in life, just useful for getting into college.  
"Was she asking for it? Did she ask you nice? If she was asking for it did she ask you twice?" Michaela sang.  
I shuddered. It felt as though she was singing it at me. But she wasn't. I was just paranoid. Michaela knew that what had gone on in the attic was just as much her fault as it was mine. Actually, she didn't seem to be thinking about that much lately. Since we'd come to LA, she'd barely been thinking at all. That was good. It was easier for both of us this way. I went back to concentrating on the band. They were pretty good. Not great. Not as good as Manson had been. I know you'll all think I'm up myself for that, but if you think about it carefully, you'll agree with me. And why not? It's right.  
I lifted my glass of Dr Pepper and took a sip. It was empty. Damn. I'd have to get myself another drink. I walked over to the buffet and ordered a drink. "A Dr Pepper thanks," I said, handing over my glass. The barmaid looked surprised. I must have looked older than I thought I did. The barmaid filled my glass and handed it back to me in return for a $5 note. Rip-off. I began to make my way back to where I'd been standing before, my eyes on Michaela, who'd begun to do a grunge version of Jewel's 'Daddy'. Don't ask.  
"Hey! Watch where you're going! Ew!" a high pitched voice shrieked.  
I turned my attention away from my sister, to see what had happened. Most of my Dr Pepper was no longer in my glass. It was on a short, red- haired girl who was trying to clean up her black dress. "Oh - I'm sorry," I said apologetically. I smiled, hopefully mischievously. "Steins don't show on black....."  
The girl acknowledged my joke with a little smile. "No. But - what was that you were drinking?"  
"Dr Pepper."  
"Thank god. If it had been alcohol my parents would have killed me. I have to use breath freshener as it is," the girl looked relieved.  
I didn't understand what she meant. "I guess I'll have to get myself another one. Do you want a Dr Pepper......?"  
"Alisha. And no. I hate Dr Pepper. It tastes like cough medicine," Alisha explained. "I wouldn't mind a beer though....."  
"Are you over 21? Because that's how old you have to be in this state before you can drink," I said, looking at her doubtfully.  
"No. And you're not either, evidently. But don't worry, it's not like they care. They'll sell it to you anyway," Alisha said, with a challenging tone to her voice.  
I thought for a second. My parents had always taught me the dangers of booze and ciggies...... But then again, Alisha was very pretty and I didn't want to look like a wimp in front of her. I laughed. "Of course I'll buy you a beer. I was just kidding with you. My name's TJ," I added, as we walked over to the bar.  
We bought our drinks and walked back to where I'd been standing originally. "So," Alisha said. "Do you come here often?"  
I shook my head. "No. This is the first time I've been here, ever. My sister's in the band. She's the lead singer. What about you?"  
"Me? Oh, I don't really care where I go. Just as long as it's out of the house, away from my parents. They're so uptight. They gave me a 2AM curfew? Can you believe that?" Alisha looked sad.  
"I don't have a curfew. I never have. I don't live with my parents, only my Michaela, and I'm older than her, so she can't boss me around. But she does try to sometimes," I said, explaining my situation.  
"What's the age difference?" Alisha asked.  
"Hmmm? Oh, four minutes," I explained.  
Alisha smirked. "Well then, you certainly should be in charge."  
"Exactly. That's what I try to tell her."  
"I have an older sister. Her name's Jordan and she's 21, a fashion design major. She's such a pain. She won't buy me drinks. I asked her once and she told our parents. Can you believe that?" Alisha complained.  
"What a bitch. Sometimes Michaela doesn't let me read her magazines because she thinks I'll kiss the pictures," I joined in.  
Alisha looked unimpressed. "Right....."  
"Hi TJ, who's your friend?" said Rod, who'd approached from behind. He leered at Alisha and smiled.  
"Alisha, this is Rod, Michaela's boyfriend," I said.  
"Hi Rod," Alisha acknowledged. She didn't seem all that attracted to him. Good.  
"Hi," Rod said dismissively. "So TJ, you know how it's your birthday in a couple of weeks?"  
"How could I forget?" I said, sarcastically.  
"Well, I think you and Michaela should have a party. It'd be really good, seeing as you don't have any parents and all. Everyone'd have a really great time," Rod said enthusiastically.  
Alisha nodded sympathetically. "Parents," she said, shaking her head.  
I thought for a second. A party would be great chance to see Alisha again. "Yeah. I think we'll have it on the Saturday after our birthday You wanna come Alisha?"  
"The eighteenth?" Rod asked.  
I nodded. "Sure. How old will you be?" Alisha asked.  
"Seventeen," I replied.  
Alisha seemed to approve. "I'm sixteen too," she added, seeing me stare at her.  
"Hi TJ, hi Rod," Michaela said, running over. Rod put his arm around her possessively.  
Alisha looked at Michaela, seeming quite excited. Great. This was all I needed. Alisha was a lesbian. "Michaela!" Alisha said excitedly. "Michaela Morgan! I'm Alisha Reed, you know, from Beverly Hills High?"  
Michaela looked around her nervously. "Excuse me? I think you must have the wrong Michaela. I'm not Michaela Morgan, I'm Michaela Hanson." Rod and I nodded in agreement. Poor Michaela!  
"No, you're Michaela Morgan. You look so much like her," Alisha was certain she had the right girl.  
Michaela shook her head. "I'm sorry, you're wrong. Uh TJ, I'm so tired. I just want to go home and sleep. Can we go now?...... You can drive." Michaela looked at me meaningfully.  
"Um, yeah," I replied. I looked inside Michaela's bag, which I'd been carrying with me and took out a pen and paper, and scribbled my number and address on it. "Here's my number and address," I said, handing it to Alisha. "See ya at the party!"  
"See you TJ," Alisha said, uncertainly.  
Michaela kissed Rod goodbye. "Bye!" she said, weaving as we walked out of the bar. "Shit, I went to junior high with her too," she said as we walked into the carpark.  
"Cool, can I see the photos?" I asked.  
Michaela frowned. "Why'd you have to invite her to our house?" she moaned. "Out whole life is going to be ruined because of your hormones! But then again, what else is new?" 


	15. It's My Party

Chapter 15 - "It's My Party....." - Michaela's Story  
March 18th, 2000 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
"Oh Michaela, you're so lucky to have someone like Rod," Jenny said sadly, stirring her Pepsi. "I have no one. I haven't had a boyfriend in like, three months, and he was big loser."  
"Well Jen, it's better to have no one than to have a loser," I said sympathetically. "Look," I added. "You are so pretty, I'm sure it's just a matter of minutes before you find someone new. There are heaps of guys here. I'll bet they're all just too nervous to approach you." I giggled. "I mean, they ARE TJ's friends."  
Jenny smiled. "That's so sweet of you Michaela. I just hope it's true."  
"Hi guys!" Kristy said, bounding over. "Do you have any party games lined up?"  
I raised my eyebrows. "Kristy, we're in year 11. We are way beyond 'pass the parcel'. I mean, next year, we'll be seniors."  
Kristy groaned. "I was thinking more along the lines of 'seven minutes in heaven'."  
Jenny nearly fell off the lounge from laughing. "That's even sadder Kristy! No one's played that game since like, junior high! You don't need that sort of excuse to kiss Brad."  
Kristy frowned and shook her head. "I swear, you guys have no idea just how desired Brad is," she said, walking away.  
It was TJ's and my seventeenth birthday party, the first proper party we'd ever had together. This had to be the best birthday party I'd had in years. Even if TJ had invited that Alisha girl. She didn't seem to be making a lot of trouble though, we hadn't been friends and she hadn't ever come to my house, so she only had a vague idea of where I, Michaela Morgan, lived. Speak of the devil. She approached, tagging along behind TJ.  
"Rod's here," TJ informed me. "Do you want to see him?"  
I looked at Jenny. "Don't mind me," she said cheerfully. "Go right ahead."  
"You sure?" I asked, taking her hand. She nodded, so I followed TJ over to the door. I heard Jenny sigh and slump back into the seat. Rod was standing in the doorway between the loungeroom and the kitchen. "Hi," I said.  
"Happy birthday Michaela!" he said. "I have your present."  
"Really?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. TJ and Alisha walked away.  
"Yeah," Rod said, kissing my forehead. "But I'd rather give it to you in private, so do you mind going up to your room?"  
"No. That's fine," I said, walking back into the lounge room, towards the stairs.  
"I like your outfit," Rod said, checking out my purple knit skirt and cardigan. More likely he liked the fact that the skirt was short.  
"Thanks," I replied. I walked into my bedroom and Rod followed, closing the door behind him. We sat down on the bed. Rod handed me a small box. I opened it. Inside was a pretty silver necklace with a pearl on it.  
"Do you like it?" Rod asked.  
I nodded. "It's beautiful." I lifted my hair and Rod fastened the necklace around my neck. "You know, it means so much to me that you bought me this because now I know that you really respect me, that I'm not just another notch on your belt, or so to speak."  
Rod smiled and kissed me. We lay back on my bed. My room was so much nicer than Rod's. No Pammie posters in my room - just cool-girl-power- chicklets and cute guys. Rod slipped his hand underneath my cardigan. My god - did this guy know nothing about foreplay? He sure moved fast. Rod stopped kissing my mouth and began to kiss my neck and chest. I closed my eyes. This was actually pretty nice. Very nice actually.  
Maybe I should sleep with Rod. He really did care about me and he was VERY good. I decided to tell him this and opened my eyes, running my hands through Rod's hair. It was blonde - the same colour as mine. "Tweedle-Tay?" I said softly to myself. "What are you doing here?"  
What was going on? Why was I lying on my bed making out with my brother? This had not been happening a few moments before. I felt Tweedle- Tay's hand travel up under my skirt. "Stop it," I said softly. "Stop it. Stop it. Stop it Tay. Stop it."  
Tweedle-Tay's hand was resting on my underwear. "Tay, stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Please, stop it. No, this isn't right. Stop it, Tay, stop it," I protested.  
Tweedle-Tay's hand found it's way underneath my underwear. I tensed. "Stop it. Stop it." He had to be stopped. "TWEEDLE-TAY, IF YOU DON'T STOP IT RIGHT NOW, I'LL TELL MOM AND SHE WON'T LET YOU READ MY MAGAZINES!" I yelled.  
He got off me.  
"What the fuck!?" Rod yelled, jumping off the bed. "What the hell is going on with you Michaela? Everything was going just fine Michaela. You were enjoying yourself, I could tell. But then you started saying all this crap about how 'Tay' should stop it, and I just thought I'd let you fantasise and crap, but no, you have scream out some crap about 'Tweedle- Tay' and magazines. What the hell is going on with you Michaela?"  
Whilst Rod had been saying all these things my world was falling down around me. Everything, about the attic, about my parents, about my REAL life, was coming back to me. I was living through it again. I was living through hell again. "Well, Michaela?" Rod pressed.  
I shook my head. "You wouldn't understand," I said.  
"Bingo! I don't understand. Michaela, something is seriously wrong up there in your head and if you're not going to spill...... You're scaring me. I don't want to be around a schitz," Rod said angrily.  
"I'm not a schitz, Rod. You know, if you knew...." I protested softly.  
"That's the thing Michaela - I don't know. And I'm sick of you. This relationship is going nowhere. I'm not getting anything out of it...."  
"Well then, I guess it's over," I said. I removed the necklace from my neck. "I guess you'll be wanting this back," I said, throwing it at him.  
Rod picked it up off the floor and snarled. "I would want to have sex with you anyway..... you had small tits," he said, leaving the room.  
"They are not!" I called out pathetically, through my tears. Don't think I was crying about Rod. I wasn't. As I'm sure you all figured out months before I did, he was a bastard. I was crying because I was realising what my life really was. I got up off the bed and walked out my room, ready to join the useless party.  
As I walked down the hallway, towards the stair, I heard strange noises coming from Tweedle-Tay's room. I opened the door. Kristy and Brad were having sex on the bed. If I'd been in a better mood I would have stored that image in my brain for next time I went on a diet, but...... please, who really gives a fuck about that sort of thing anyway? "What the fuck do you think you're doing on my brother's bed????" I screamed. "Get out! It's my turn to wash the sheets this week and that is NOT something I want to clean up!!!"  
They just stared back at me. That was the final straw. Was there no one in this stupid city who had half a brain? I walked back into my room and picked up a bag. I shoved a pair of jeans and a couple of tops in, grabbed my purse and walked quickly down the stairs and to the front door. On my hurry out, I nearly knocked over Gwen, who was hurrying up the stairs. "What's wrong?" she asked, surprised. "It's your party!"  
I looked at her sadly, through my tear-filled eyes. "I'm so sorry Gwen," I said guiltily, making a dash towards my car.  
I hopped in and began to bawl. What was wrong with me? I had absolutely nothing except a frivolous little existence that revolved around cheerleading, helping Cordelia become Spring Queen, and dating Rod. I started the car.  
'There's more important things than making sure your watch looks just right, and second hand opinions won't make you look any smarter....'  
Great. Tweedle-Tay had left his Natalie Imbruglia CD in the car and now even she was yelling at me for being such a frivolous bitch. I began to drive away from the house. I was wasting my life and killing my brain by spending my entire life thinking about things that, in the scheme of things, didn't really matter. It would be bad enough for a normal person to do this, but me? I should know better. I'd been locked up in an attic, been raped by my twin brother, and rejected by my parents when I'd done nothing to hurt them what-so-ever..... I began to cry even harder.  
'Brother shoots brother but meanwhile you're fixing up your face..... You're not affected by the truth unless it's on your doorstep. Deoderise your paradise - no point in getting crazy!'  
I didn't want to live in the superficial crap world anymore. I couldn't live in the superficial crap world anymore. Too many terrible things had happened. I nearly slept with Rod. I shuddered. What was I thinking? I wasn't thinking at all. I didn't know what I wanted. I knew I didn't want to live the way I'd been living, blocking out everything, by thinking about nothing, but on the other hand, I didn't want to think about the bad things that had happened either. Whenever I thought about the attic, and my parents, and Tweedle-Tay I felt as though someone was stabbing. That's not fair, actually. I did love Tweedle-Tay. He was my only real friend in the whole world and he was the person who knew me best, but..... ever since we'd met our lives had been nothing but trouble. When would it all end?  
'Sleeping in the small world, head in the sand. Better wash your hands, make a new plan! There's more important things than making sure your shoes walk just right! Ignore reality - there's nothing you can do about it....'  
There was nothing I could do. If I continued this, I'd just be living a lie. If I thought about the past, I'd be living in hell. I couldn't go back to living the way I'd lived before my grandmother died, that was what I'd been attempting to do before.... I couldn't really do anything that I'd done before. I had to create a whole new me. A whole new life for me. But that would never happen. There was too much in the way.  
I looked at the clock and realised I'd been driving north for over an hour. It was too late for me to turn back tonight. Besides, I needed to spend some time away from Tay - and everyone else - for a few days. There was nothing I could do about my life..... to find true happiness. I wished that I was like Tay and had God to turn to, but I didn't. I saw a nice- looking hotel and pulled up. I grabbed my bag, locked the car, and walked into the reception area. "A room for...... Annabelle Morgan, thanks," I said, pulling out my credit card. I was soon sent up to a nice little suite where I could rest in the bath and ponder about how to fix up my fucked up life.  
All I had was my brother, myself, a terrible past, and a fucked up beliefs system. Fun. 


	16. Can't Hide The Past

Chapter 16 - "Can't Hide The Past" - Tweedle-Tay's Story  
March 20th, 2000 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
Damn Michaela! She'd left the house on the night of our party and left all the chores along with it. Not only did I have to clean up the house and do my usual chores, but I also had to do the shopping myself AND clean up the sheets, which was Michaela's job. I didn't know for sure what had gone on at our party, but I had a pretty good idea, considering the stains on my sheets. The only plus about Michaela not being here was that I got to sleep in her bed that night and leave the washing until Sunday morning. And today Michaela hadn't turned up at school either.....  
I was actually more worried about her than pissed off. Michaela wasn't one to jig, even though she was friends with the people she was friends with. Something must have gone wrong at the party and caused her to leave, but it would have been nice if she'd told me about it. No one could tell me anything about what might have made her leave, except Gwen, who told me something about Michaela apologising to her.  
The radio started to play "MMMPop". Great. That was all I needed. A reminder of my teenybopper past, along with a missing sister. Luckily I was half way down the driveway and only had to listen to it up until the end of the first verse. I stopped the car and got out, pulling the groceries from the back seat. They were heavy without Michaela there to carry half of them. I walked up to the front door fumbling with the keys. I opened the door and ran into the kitchen, putting the food down on the bench. I was just starting to unpack the food when I heard noises coming from the lounge room. I stopped what I was doing and listened.  
"I'm Betsy and I'm in charge now and you're not getting out until I say you are," a high pitched voice was saying.  
I recognised it immediately. 'Melrose Place' repeats. Michaela and I had watched so many episodes of that while we were in the attic that I'd have recognised that episode - Michaela's and my favourite - anywhere. Michaela was home! If someone had broken into our house while I was out, they wouldn't be sitting in the lounge room watching soap operas. Oh yeah, and then there was the fact that our usual car had been sitting in the driveway..... I guess I'd failed to notice that.  
I put the perishables in the fridge and quickly made my way to the lounge room. Michaela was curled up on the lounge rhythmically spooning ice-cream into her mouth. There were two empty containers sitting next to the couch on the floor. I walked over and grabbed the ice-cream and spoon away from her.  
She looked up. "Hey! Give it back! I was eating that!" she said.  
I frowned and sat down on the other end of the couch. "I think you've eaten enough today."  
Michaela looked pissed off. "Oh really? And since when are you in charge of the body police?"  
I rolled my eyes. "I'm not. You have my metabolism, you won't get fat regardless of what you eat. But you're going to make yourself sick."  
"Well then maybe my body will match my mind."  
I looked at Michaela. Perhaps I should change my tactics. "Why did you leave our party?"  
"I wasn't having any fun."  
"Michaela, you don't leave home for two days because you're birthday party isn't fun. That shows-" I began.  
"A fucked up mind?" Michaela asked. "Because if that was what you were going to say, you'd be right."  
"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked.  
Michaela sighed dramatically. "God Tweedle-Tay! Think about it. Our lives are fucked. I mean, I don't know about yours, but mine sure is. Things aren't right and they haven't been right since the day our grandmother died. Maybe they would have been alright if we'd never met, but -"  
"So you don't like me?" I asked, confused. Michaela and I were best friends, and here she was saying she wished she'd never met me.  
Michaela looked pained. "Of course I like you Tay," she said earnestly. "I just don't like the situation we've been in, the situation we're always in and we're always going to be in."  
"Do you have PMS?" I asked. She gave me a look. "I'm sorry," I apologised. "But you're always so happy..... you're a cheerleader, you're popular and you really love Rod."  
"I HATE ROD!!!!!" Michaela screamed, sitting up. "HE'S A BASTARD!" She quickly composed herself. "Tay, being a cheerleader isn't everything. It's nothing. It's just jumping up and down and smiling and acting like nothing but a big bimbo...." She paused. "All that stuff is so superficial anyway." Michaela took my hand. "Tay, don't you ever think about the past?"  
I wasn't quite sure which part of the past Michaela was referring to. "The past.......? Sure, I think about childhood, about the band, about....."  
"About the attic."  
I looked up at the ceiling, avoiding Michaela's penetrating gaze. "I guess so. Sometimes."  
"And when you think about the attic, don't you feel this deep unrest that you can't get rid of?" Michaela looked into my eyes deeply, making it impossible for me to lie.  
Still, it was creepy how close to the truth she was. I gulped. "Well yeah...... But Michaela, we mustn't think about the attic. It's pointless. We'll never be happy if we think about the attic. We have to move on."  
Michaela dropped my hand. She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Tweedle-Tay. I tried to do that, and look at me. I became an idiot. We can't hide the past..... You know, our lives would be so different right now if our father wasn't morally inept. He'd have let me stay at your house, you'd still be a pop star and everyone would be happy."  
"If our father hadn't been morally inept, he'd never have sent you away in the first place," I said, pointing out what I considered to be the obvious.  
For some reason this cheered Michaela up to no end. "That would have been so great!" she said enthusiastically. "We would have been like proper twins. We would have had heaps of birthday parties and played heaps of games and we wouldn't have been in the attic and you wouldn't have......"  
Michaela left a silence where the obvious lay. "Yeah," I said eventually. "That would have been good."  
Michaela frowned. "But it wouldn't have happened. If our father hadn't been so morally inept he and our mother would never have...... committed incest." Michaela paused. "We never would have been born."  
Well, that certainly brightened up my day. "So, what actually brought all of this on..... this depression, this deep thought about the past?" I asked.  
Michaela blushed. "Well Rod and I, we were going to have sex and.... look, I don't want to tell you this."  
"Then who are you ever going to tell?"  
"Okay, I had flash-backs to when you raped me," Michaela said quickly in a matter of fact tone.  
I frowned. Fuck. What was wrong with me? My infatuations would forever cast a shadow on our lives. Wow. That sounded like Virginia Andrews. I'd have to use it for a creative writing assignment. "What happened in my room - with my sheets?"  
Michaela actually giggled. "Kristy and Brad!" She grimaced. "Disgusting, I know."  
"When are you coming back to school?" I said, happy that the conversation was moving to more up-beat topics.  
A shadow fell over Michaela's face. "Oh Tweedle-Tay, I don't want to go back yet!" she moaned, lying back down on the couch.  
I groaned. Back to the depressing stuff. "Why not?" I asked, trying to hide the fact that I was pissed off.  
"There's no point. Don't you get it? I'm sick of our lives. I'm sick of the depressing parts, I'm sick of the stupid, frivolous parts. I don't want to go back to school. There's no point....." Michaela whined, screwing up her face.  
God she looked awful when she did that. "What about graduating from high school?" I said sarcastically. "Look, Michaela, you can't just sit there forever doing nothing. Sure, I'm traumatised by the attic too, but you don't see me jigging -" I began, more kindly.  
"You? Traumatised? Why would you be traumatised?" Michaela asked in shock.  
"I was rejected by our parents too....." I said, hurt. "You know, sure, you've had bad things happen to you, but I gave up a lot for you so don't give me selfish shit Michaela........" She said nothing. No wonder. "Look, you say you don't want to go to school because of the attic, but what else are you going to do? What can we do about the attic?" I paused. Michaela did not cut in. "We can't do anything, so until you come up with something we may as well just go to school. Not everyone there is a superficial bimbo like Cordelia. Who you hang out with is a matter of choice, especially for someone like you Michaela," I said, throwing on a compliment at the end for good measure. "So are you coming to school tomorrow?"  
Michaela looked up at me and did a half-smile. "I'll come back to school, but not tomorrow. I'm not ready yet. I'm too depressed," she said, trying to look innocent.  
I knew she was upset though so I didn't comment. "Okay, but you will come on Wednesday?"  
Michaela nodded.  
"Good. Come on, help me unpack the groceries," I said, taking her hand and pulling her up off the couch.  
"Okay Tay," she said softly.  
We walked into the kitchen. Lying on the couch eating ice-cream wasn't my idea of a good way to handle depression, but if it worked for Michaela that was fine with me. 


	17. Pieces Of You

Chapter 17 - "Pieces of You" - Michaela's Story  
March 22nd, 2000 - San Fernando Valley, California  
  
"They made up their minds and they started packing. They left before the sun came up that day...."  
Tweedle-Tay was playing his 'Fastball' CD on the way to school. What a load of crap. It was so boring and pointless. I was torn between wanting to hear 'Aqua' to cheer me up and 'Jewel' to depress me. But 'Fastball'? That was totally inappropriate. Obviously Tweedle-Tay wasn't into playing songs that would affect your emotions. I should have gotten the choice of what we played in the car anyway. I was going to school for Tweedle-Tay anyway, because he was my brother and I loved him. I didn't want to be an awful depressing burden to him. He could forget about the attic. I couldn't. Big deal.  
So now I was returning to school and I didn't know what I'd do once we actually got there. I didn't want to be friend with my normal friends anymore because I couldn't see anyway of doing that without remaining totally superficial. But if wasn't friends with them, who could I be friends with? I hadn't really gone to that much of an effort to get to know anyone outside my group. I couldn't just sit by myself and work, then I'd become a geek. Maybe I could sit with Tay and his friends. They weren't THAT uncool. I had to find friends who went with what I was, like a coordinating outfit. The problem was, I didn't know what I was. I didn't even know what I wanted to be. Except happy. I knew I wanted to be happy. I laughed bitterly to myself. What were the chances of that happening?  
"Is something wrong Michaela?" Tweedle-Tay, who was driving asked.  
"Just the usual," I replied with a little (put-on) smile. I paused. "Tay, can I sit with you today at school?"  
He looked surprised. "Sure, Kay. I don't think anyone would mind.... But don't you want to sit with YOUR friends?"  
I raised my eyebrows. "I don't think so. They're not really like me. Well, they are like a part of me, but they're not like the me I want to be."  
Tweedle-Tay smiled. "You want to be like me and my friends?" he asked, flattered. "You know Gwen is one of my friends? Are you going to start wearing pink all the time?" he laughed.  
I smiled again (this time genuinely). Just because I didn't want to be preppy cheerleader didn't mean I wanted to be bimbo fashion disaster. "I already am like you! Sort of....."  
Tweedle-Tay pretended to look shocked. "So you don't want to be like me??? Fine then." He turned away from me, pretending to be pissed off and laughed.  
It was nice of him to try and cheer me up and it was kind of working. "Well, I don't want to be a blonde teenybopper from Tulsa," I said, giggling.  
He raised his eyebrows. "Well then, you're going to face some problems." He pulled up in our usual parking spot at school.  
We got out of the car and I checked that my hair looked okay and that my dress wasn't creased. We started to walk towards the building. "I just want to be the real me, whoever that is," I said.  
"Mmmmmm," Tay said absentmindedly.  
I frowned. He wasn't paying me any attention. I looked across the lawn and saw Cordelia, Kristy and Jenny sitting on the school steps. My heart jumped and felt like throwing up, I was so scared. "Oh god Tay, what am I going to do?"  
Tweedle-Tay glanced at them and raised his eyebrows. I nodded. He shrugged. "You may as well talk to them. They do like you, you know. They wouldn't be friends with you if they didn't."  
I nodded and smiled nervously at my friends as I approached them. I looked at Tweedle-Tay, asking him to stay with me with my eyes. He sort of got the message and waited just inside the building. "Hi," I said brightly as I went to sit with my friends.  
"Hi!" Jenny said brightly.  
Cordelia looked at Jenny sharply and studied her fingernails for a few seconds, just long enough for an uncomfortable pause. "Interesting party," she said slowly. I nodded. "I heard all about what went on," she continued.  
I raised my eyebrows in shock, rather than the usual mocking way. "Really?"  
Cordelia nodded. "You don't have much class, do you?" Kristy nodded in agreement.  
"What do you mean?" I asked.  
"Well, you are bit of a... slut aren't you? Rod told us all about what happened," Cordelia said with a matter-of-fact tone. "First of all you slept with Rod, which is quite understandable - we were all beginning think you were frigid - but that wasn't enough for you, was it?"  
"You barged in on me and Brad!" Kristy said, a little too loudly. Jenny shuddered. "Because you wanted him for yourself," Kirsty added, a little more quietly.  
"And then you and Rod and Brad all had a threesome in your bedroom. You wanted them to sleep together as well, in front of a Tweedle-Tay Manson poster, for your sexual pleasure," Cordelia continued. "But they thought it was so disgusting that they left."  
Jenny nodded. "That IS disgusting," she said, shaking her head.  
"You stole my Brad!" Kristy yelled, narrowing her eyes.  
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. It was totally awful that they would believe these things about me, but they were pretty funny. "You actually believe these things?" I asked in disbelief.  
Cordelia looked surprised. "It's a bit hard not to. I've know Rod since the second grade, when we dated, and he is not one to lie."  
"Well, they're not true," I said.  
Kristy and Cordelia looked at me suspiciously. Jenny was too busy looking at the Malteser truck that had pulled up outside the school. How did she stay so thin and zitless?  
"They're not true," I repeated. "Rod wanted to have sex with me, but I didn't want to. After I saw Kristy and Brad, I left the party straight away. These things you've been telling me are all lies."  
"You are such a liar!" Kirsty said angrily. "Brad wouldn't hurt me like this if it weren't the truth."  
Cordelia shook her head in disgust. "Look Michaela, I don't have time for people like you who won't admit it when they're in the wrong. Goodbye, Michaela," she said, waving me away.  
I rolled my eyes. "Goodbye," I replied, in a saccharine sweet tone. "Have fun lining up on the dole queue," I added sarcastically. "I'm sure those skills of jumping up and down and flirting will come in handy."  
Cordelia looked shocked. "Piss off," she said.  
"Bye bye Kristy!" I said. "Bye Jenny!" I added as I walked into the building.  
Jenny looked away from the chocolate truck and at me. "Don't you want Maltesers Kay?" she asked.  
I turned back and shook my head. "No thanks!" I said as brightly as possible. Tweedle-Tay was standing in the hallway. "Why didn't you tell me about this?" I asked him.  
He looked guilty. "I didn't want to make you feel even worse than you already did," he said.  
There was a silence. "Let's go to English," I said.  
"Sure," he agreed quickly, and we walked down the hallway. So now I didn't have to be friends with a bunch of superficial cheerleaders, but Rod had convinced the entire school that I was a slut. I was nowhere near finding myself either. "Oh by the way," Tweedle-Tay added all of a sudden. "We have an essay today," he said sheepishly.  
I groaned. "Gee, thanks for telling me," I said sarcastically. I had a test now too. Everything was turning out just fine. 


	18. Hug Me Til You Drug Me Honey, Kiss Me 'T...

Chapter 18 - "Hug me till you drug me honey, Kiss me till I'm in ....." -  
Grubbery's Story  
March 30th 2000 - Tulsa, Oklahoma  
  
"Grubby honey!" my mother called in a sugary sweet voice.  
I sat up on my bed and looked for an escape route. My bedroom window was fairly close to a tree. If only..... I ran towards the window and opened it. I had one leg out when my mother entered the room.  
"Grubbery!" she screamed, he voice now less sugary. "What in heaven do you think you're doing! Get back inside now!"  
I reluctantly climbed back in through the window and turned to face her. "What now?" I asked, annoyed.  
"This!" she said, impatiently, holding up a bundle of papers. "Do you know what this is?"  
I raised my eyebrows. "Paper?" I asked sarcastically.  
She frowned, walked over, and grabbed me by the ear. "Don't be smart with me, Grubbery," she said, dragging me over to my bed and sitting me down. I rubbed my ear. She waved the papers in my face. "This Grubbery! Look at this!"  
"It's a bit hard when you're waving them around like that...." I mumbled. She handed the papers to me. It was my English assignment. "My book report?" I asked, pretending to be surprised. I made my eyes wide and innocent. "Don't you like it Mom?" I asked, making myself look hurt.  
She shook her head furiously. "No, Grubbery. It's lies, all lies," she pursed her lips and paused. "I asked you to do a non-fiction book and you did 'The Rise and Fall of the Third Chimpanzee' which is just - where did you even get it from anyway?"  
"The place most people go to for books.... the library."  
Mom frowned and put her head in her hands. She sighed and looked back up at me. "Grubbery, your father and I are very worried about you. Everybody knows that humans and chimpanzees are very different animals. Nothing in common what-so-ever. You've known this ever since you were a little boy but -" she paused again and smiled. "The Lord made people in his own image. Chimpanzees, they have nothing in common with God. They're just dumb animals."  
I didn't comment. What was there to say?  
She took my hand. "Your father and I are very worried about you. We don't understand it, we never had problems like this with Neuton, but you and - well you know, you both started to run into trouble when you were about fourteen. Grubbery, we've brought you up well but you're becoming, how can I put this? Please don't be offended by this but you're a little -" she looked away from me, tears brimming in her eyes. "Left of the middle," she whispered. She shook her head. "You don't even play with your paintball gun anymore. A nice waste of money that was....."  
She obviously wanted me to contribute to the conversation. "Mom! Adolescence is all about rebellion and learning to become your own person. I still believe in the Lord," I said, crossing myself, "But I'm now aware that some of the things this family does," I looked at her meaningfully, "Are wrong."  
My mother frowned and shook her head furiously. "No Grub. Your daddy and I have always, well almost always, obeyed God's will. God's will is always right. But you, you're not obeying God's words. We're worried about you. We think it might be best if you went somewhere where you could nurture your spiritual side for a while like -"  
"Like the attic??" I screamed, jumping up off the bed.  
She blushed. "Well it is a good thinking space but I was thinking more along the lines of living with a priest for a while. It's not that we don't want you and love you, we're just afraid of losing you."  
They wanted to do to me what they did to my older brother and sister. What did they think I was - an idiot? They thought they could send me away to live with a gay priest and I'd come back MORE chaste and pure. I didn't think so! I shook my head. "Do you think I'm stupid or something?"  
She frowned. "No......"  
"Then why the fuck are you trying to emotionally abuse me like you did Tay and Kay?"  
She shuddered when I swore, and when I said the names. "We're not trying to abuse you, we're trying to make you more.... pure," she said carefully, her hands fluttering up to her neck, as they always did when she was nervous.  
"Oh get fucked!" I yelled, walking quickly out of my bedroom. Sometimes I had to get away from my psychopathic, teenybopper, family, and now was one of those times. I made my way down to the garage where the 400cc motorbike that I'd bought back in my Manson days was lying. I opened the garage door, hopped on the bike and rode away, before my heavily pregnant mother could catch up with me.  
I rode down the street, enjoying the wind rushing against my face. I realised that I'd forgotten my helmet but, what the hell, it was good to live on the edge sometimes. My parents were so mentally deranged, my older brother was a right-wing nazi, my little sisters were stupid teenyboppers... Mackie was okay and Zoe was too young to tell. I remembered Tay and Kay. Tay was so cool. We'd been best friends. We'd never fought. Okay, not NEVER, but at least he was good fun and not evil. And Michaela, she was so pretty and bubbly and good natured. They were the best members of my family and they weren't even here.  
I wondered what was going on in their lives. Were they living normally? Were they happy? Did they ever think about me, about getting me out of this asylum? I hoped they did. I thought about them. If they didn't think about me, I'd have no one. Were they even together? Were they.....?  
I headed towards Cherrybrook Road, the main road in Tulsa, and quickly checked for any coming cars. Good, there were none, so I decided not to stop before going through the intersection. It was good to live on the edge sometimes. Just as I was starting to cross the intersection I heard a truck coming. I placed my foot on the brake and I heard the screech of the truck in my panic. My bike stopped at the beginning of the intersection but I did not and neither did the truck. I flew through the air and felt my head smash against the truck as it came to a halt.  
"Fuck!" screamed the truck diver, climbing out of the truck. "Are you okay son?"  
I tried to life my head to reassure him but everything was going fuzzy. "I'm, I'm..... asklfasfl...." I mumbled, as everything went black. 


	19. Lovefool

Chapter 19 - "Lovefool" - Michaela's Story  
March 31st, 2000 - Beverly Hills, California  
  
"Michaela!" Tweedle-Tay yelled impatiently. "Come into the kitchen. You can watch 'The Bold and the Beautiful' any time. There is no way I'm going to cook the whole dinner!"  
I rolled my eyes but got up. "I'm coming...." I whined. 'B & B' was only on once a day and it was always on when Tay wanted to make dinner. Why we couldn't eat dinner half an hour later was beyond me. It was probably because Tweedle-Tay didn't want dinner to interfere with 'Baywatch'. Stupid, plastic, Barbie dolls.  
Despite the fact that Tweedle-Tay was a guy (and feminists can shoot me right now) he was the better cook of the two of us. I didn't see why I couldn't let him do the cooking and take up some other job that he didn't like doing, like..... the washing? I DID change my clothes more often than he did, and he ate more than I did. That would be more fair and more pleasant for both of us. I walked into the kitchen. "What do you want me to do?" I asked reluctantly.  
He pointed towards the fridge. "Get out some vegetables and make a salad," he suggested, turning back to the steaks on the stove.  
I obliged and picked out some carrots, lettuce, capsicum, tomatoes and onion. It wasn't as though either of us had anyone to kiss so who really cared about bad breath? I looked at the steak. At least Tay wasn't being totally mean. I hated touching raw meat. It smelt so bad and looked so germy. Probably a hang-up from Junior High biology classes. I smiled. "Taylor's pregnant to Jordan......" I said absentmindedly.  
Tweedle-Tay looked at me, surprised. "Huh?"  
I smiled smugly. "'Bold and the Beautiful'," I explained.  
"I see."  
"Taylor and Jordan have been having an affair but Taylor's supposed to marry Clarke so she's pretending that it's Clarke's baby. But, the funny thing is, Clarke's having an affair with Grace, who's Jordan's wife and Clarke's long lost sister," I went on.  
Tay shook his head. "I can't believe you watch that stuff," he said. "And you call it entertainment......"  
I smiled. "It has a better plot that 'Baywatch'. And it's probably more true to life. Or at least," I said bitterly, "It is if your life is anything like ours," I said, peeling the carrots.  
There was a silence. The phone rang. "I'll get it," I said quickly, dropping the peeler and running to the phone. Not that it would be for me. "Hello?" I said, picking it up. It was Alisha, for Tay. "Sure, I'll just get him," I said, beckoning for him to come over.  
I handed Tweedle-Tay the phone and went back to preparing the vegetables. It was kind of boring so I subtly eavesdropped on their conversation. It was so sickening, the way he was cooing at her and everything. She was nothing special, she actually seemed kind of bitchy, if you asked me. My brother could do much better. Tweedle-Tay deserved someone who was smart, and pretty, and witty, and fun, and most of all, someone who understood him. There was no way Alisha could understand Tweedle-Tay - she didn't know anything about him. One day Tay would find someone worth while. One day I would too...... I frowned. Stupid Alisha. Tweedle-Tay was never that nice to me. He never offered to do anything nice for me. I mean, who was it that gave him half her fortune? Certainly not Alisha. Tweedle-Tay should learn to hold on to the people who really cared about him. Like...... well, not Alisha. I smiled to myself. She was probably putting out.  
I arranged all the vegetables nicely in a bowl but I didn't put on any dressing. Dressing smelt bad and it gave me a headache. I looked at the salad and smiled. Very nice. I checked on the steaks. They looked really ready, like if they were any more ready they'd be burnt. I still didn't want to touch them. "Tay!" I yelled.  
"You sound so sexy when you talk like that," he said, making his voice deeper, like our father's.  
I was taken aback until I realised he was talking to Alisha. "Tay!"  
"I love you too Gorgeous. And you know what I want to do to you...."  
I grimaced. This was bad. Really bad. Even when Tweedle-Tay had been in love with me he hadn't been this obsessive. He'd been more innocent and childlike. He hadn't treated me like I was a goddess. And next to Alisha, I was a goddess. I walked over to him and grabbed the phone. "Sorry Alisha," I said sweetly, "Our dinner's burning and I don't like touching meat, so I need TJ's help. Bye!" I hung up on her.  
Tweedle-Tay frowned. "I was talking to her. She'll think I don't like her...." he said sadly.  
I rolled my eyes. "No, I don't think she's caught on yet," I said. His face fell. "Sorry Tay," I said apologetically, "But our dinner is burning. Just get the steaks off the stove," I said, pushing him towards it.  
We fixed up the dinners and went out into the lounge room to watch TV. I grabbed the remote control and turned the TV to 'Entertainment Tonight'. It was good to keep up with the news. They were showing some story about David Hasselholf's face lift. Boring. "So," I said to Tweedle- Tay. "How's Alisha?"  
His face lit up like a light bulb. "She is so great. You know Michaela," he said smiling, "I have never met anyone as wonderful as Alisha. She is the best girl ever....."  
Really? "I'm glad you feel that way," I managed to choke out. "It's nice to have someone you care that much about." I felt like crying. Weird. There was no reason for me to feel like this. Tweedle-Tay had a right to have a girlfriend. I had absolutely no reason to feel..... jealous? No. That couldn't be right.  
"She is soo pretty, the prettiest girl I've EVER seen. She's ever prettier than Cindy Crawford. She's really smart too - and funny," Tweedle- Tay gushed.  
Tweedle-Tay was in love. Why did that make me feel so bad? I used to have Rod. Tweedle-Tay hadn't complained much about that, and when he did it was only because he knew Rod was a bastard. So why did every kind word my brother said about Alisha make me feel like someone was stabbing me? "Prettier than Cindy?" I asked light-heatedly, stretching my face into a smile. "I thought that was impossible," I said, thinking on all the Cindy Crawford posters on his wall.  
"I did too," Tweedle-Tay said wistfully.  
I felt like punching him. All these hidden insults! I was pretty too, everyone always said so. I was quite possibly the prettiest girl in the eleventh grade. That sounded bad, didn't it? Well I couldn't help it. I didn't ask to be born this way, did I? Anyway, I didn't think I was prettier than Cindy Crawford. No way. I wasn't supermodel material. But...... oh well, it was all too complicated to explain. "Good for you," I said shakily.  
"I love her so much," Tay continued.  
Didn't he know when to shut up?  
"She makes the funniest jokes," he went on. "Like the other day we were talking about you and she said you probably weighed over 100lbs and I said you weighed 120 and she said 'what a rhinoceros!'. Rhinoceros! Get it?"  
"Tweedle-Tay!" I snapped. "Not everyone is five foot tall like Alisha. I wear a size 4 dress, I hardly think I'm overweight!"  
"Oh you're not," he said quickly. "But-"  
"Fourteen year old, ex-child star Grubbery Manson -" the presenter on Entertainment Tonight said.  
Tweedle-Tay and I paused our conversation and turned out attention to the television set.  
"Is in a come after an accident with a truck yesterday afternoon. Grubbery is staying at the 'Mae Ashton Hospital' in West Tulsa and has not yet come out of the coma. It just goes to show what so much attention at such a young age can do to a child...." the presenter continued. "On a happier note Cameron Diaz and Kevin Richardson of the Backstreet Boys married last week and we have exclusive footage...."  
This was the final straw. I burst into tears. "Oh my god..... You don't think it's true do you?"  
Tweedle-Tay's face, that had been so happy two minutes ago, had crumbled. "I guess so, 'Entertainment Tonight' doesn't lie. Grub's not exactly a big star anymore. They'd have nothing to gain by the rumour."  
"Poor Grub! What do you think happened?"  
"Something close to what happened to us?" Tweedle-Tay's lip began to quiver and he began to cry.  
I gave him a hug. "We're going to have to do something."  
"Like what?"  
"Maybe we should go and save him before he becomes as fucked up as we are...." I said softly.  
"Go back to Tulsa?" Tay asked, surprised.  
"It'll give us a chance to face our fears..... Grub needs us. He will come out of the coma," I said, with far more certainty than I felt. "And when he does, we'll have to stop him from going any further."  
  
To find out what happens next, check out Return To Stoneybrook Crescent, part 4 in the Tweedle-Tay Saga. 


End file.
